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Daniel Bryan
Bryan Danielson
  • Birthdate: 05/22/1981 (age 33)
  • Height: 5'10"
  • Weight: 210lb

Other Notable Achievements: King Of The In...

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A lot of wrestling fans are excited about the apparent singles push that Dean Ambrose (AKA Jon Moxley) is currently receiving. I'm here to tell you all why you shouldn't be. Join me as I break down the reasons why Dean Ambrose (Johnathan Good) is terrible for wrestling and a terrible human being.

Ambrose doesn't look the part: When I think of a typical WWE star, I think of a guy who's got a perfect orange tan, boxed trunks, a fade haircut, and maybe even some brightly colored wristbands. Does Dean Ambrose look like any of that? No! He looks like a bad combination of Jimmy Wang YangJamie Noble and my uncle Brett. Wrestlers shouldn't compete in jeans! (John Cena doesn't count. Those are shorts and they're stylish!) And that wife beater! What message is he trying to convey? That he beats women? That's terrible! And it leads me to my next point...

Ambrose is a misogynist: Dean Ambrose refers to himself as the "Titty Master." To master something is to control it. Therefore, one can only assume that Dean Ambrose wishes to control women's breasts. It's appalling! I can't believe this company would employ such a pig. In my day, WWE (Or WWF, as the kids used to call it) had respect for women. Dean Ambrose is singlehandedly setting the feminist movement back in wrestling.

The guy is clearly crazy: Have you seen Ambrose's eyes? That guy isn't all there. It's almost scary to watch sometimes. The way he twitches and looks like he's about to snap. I, for one, fear for the safety of other WWE superstars. I don't know if he's taken one too many shots to the head or what, but if WWE isn't careful, they might have another Chris Benoit or Daniel Bryan on their hands.

I've listed just a few of the many reasons that Ambrose is hurting the business. What do you think? Leave your thoughts in the comments below. Thanks for reading!