Thursday, March 28, 2024
EditorialPredictions for Extreme Rules

Predictions for Extreme Rules

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It seems like forever since I have last written here. Has it really been that long? I think I have a full grown beard by now. Anyways, the sixth annual Extreme Rules show will be taking place Sunday, so why not go through the matches and see what will take place why don’t we. I think I’m going to ditch those long introductions I do. I know it’s getting tiresome.

Cesaro (C) and Tyson Kidd (C) vs. Big E and Kofi Kingston (A New Day) – WWE Tag Team Championships

Clearly WWE didn’t think that the Lucha Dragons would be a better matchup quality-wise for Kidd and Cesaro so A New Day faces thema gain. What I do not get is that both teams are heel teams. Where is the freaking balance? Ugh. Anyways, if WWE is going to take the straps off of Tyson and Claudio Castagnoli, it shouldn’t be to A New Day. The heel turn for this trio was a welcome change, but they still need to find a way to make themselves relevant and get them some real heat before WWE considers putting the straps on them. The only reason why they turned heel in the first place was because the people thought they were insufferable douches as good guys. Costing the Lucha Dragons a match by holding Sin Cara’s leg is a great, slimy heel move, but they need to do something drastic. I’m going with Kidd and Cesaro here and I’ll be patient for the better, more entertaining matchup in the Lucha Dragons.

Winners: Tyson Kidd and Cesaro


Daniel Bryan (C) vs. Bad News Barrett – Intercontinental Championship

Whether or not this match will take place is still anyone’s guess, but if this match takes place, the bearded goat will be retaining the title. It seems as though since after the failed Nexus storyline, Barrett has been in a perpetual tailspin. From being buried to some of the lower-caliber wrestlers on the roster to useless and failed Intercontinental Title reigns, he’s nothing more than a glorified jobber right now. He cannot be taken seriously, which is a shame because he had a lot of promise. At the end of the day, taking the strap off of Daniel Bryan should only come in the worst-case scenario in which he would have to be out for extended time. Even in that situation, Barrett holding the title is a lot like Santino Marella holding the United States Championship. The people know that he can’t be taken seriously as the champion, so everyone is waiting until the new champ comes around. If this match gets extended time, it could be a very great bout, but don’t expect the taller one to win.

Winner: Daniel Bryan

Dolph Ziggler vs. Sheamus – Kiss Me Arse Match

A Kiss Me Arse match. How extreme. Now these two have great chemistry and this can be another great match on the card. However, of all the matches you can have for this match; 2 out of 3 falls, Falls Count Anywhere, you go with a Kiss Me Arse match. Whatever. I must say, though, that Sheamus’ repackaging is one of the best I have ever seen in a WWE superstar for sometime. His old school beat down of proverbial jobber Zack Ryder gave an old-school heel type of vibe. From the silly haircut to the new entrance and music, it makes you wonder why WWE made Sheamus put smiles on people’s faces to begin with. He should have never turned to begin with, and he never should go back. As for the winner of this match, it has to be the Celtic Warrior. You don’t repackage a superstar as great as you did Sheamus and have him lose his first match back. As much as I feel for Ziggler and how I believed he should have gotten a main-even push after his Survivor Series performance, in this situation, the heel needs to go over. Not sure in a PG world that we will see some actual butt kissing, but if they do, Ziggler is going to have to kiss Sheamus’ snow white, er, arse.

Winner: Sheamus

Luke Harper vs. Dean Ambrose – Street Fight

Dean Ambrose has not won on PPV since the Payback PPV last year, and that was in a six man elimination match. The last time he won a singles match on PPV was Night of Champions 2013 when he beat Dolph Ziggler. That is how bad it has been for Ambrose. Every time you think he picks up team on TV, he always wets the bed on the big time stage. Even more demoralizing for Ambrose is that feud is all over him getting mad that he was consistently getting destroyed by Luke Harper. Harper had no beef with Ambrose, he just put him through a ladder. Talk about a sore loser. As for Harper, I believe this feud is just for him to get something to do. He has a lot of talent, and if you listened yesterday, HE ACTUALLY SPEAKS! Predicting the winner of this match will be difficult to do considering which way it can go. You can have Ambrose break out of his slump and give him something interesting to do, or you can always give Harper the win and continue to have Ambrose look more and more irrelevant as the months go by. What Ambrose needs in my opinion is a heel turn. I would think WWE would capitalize on his hot run after his return late last year, but that feud against Bray Wyatt just sucked the life out him and now he’s nowhere. How sad. I’m picking Harper here, but this is a vote of no confidence. Ambrose can easily go over, but if recent history has taught us anything, Ambrose losing on PPV may be a surety.

Winner: Luke Harper

Roman Reigns vs. The Big Show – Last Man Standing

Speaking of people who need heel turns. First, having Big Show and Reigns once again, in front of a Chicago crowd no less, is asking for a riot. WWE pushing Roman Reigns and making him credible in the ring is not going to work if you place him with The Big Show. WWE better not be thinking that this is a David vs. Goliath sort of thing, because Roman is not Rey Mysterio. He’s a big dude. Hell, he’s BEATEN Big Show, multiple times. The Big Show was the first person to pin Roman in a singles match. Why are we subjected to this match once again? I feel as though The Big Show is trying to make himself look relevant by getting himself involved with some of the main event guys on the roster. If they are going to have this match, if you ask me, nothing less than a squash victory for Reigns will satisfy anyone. They are far too slow in the ring, and while using weapons can increase the quality of the match, it won’t set anyone on fire, and it certainly won’t help Roman Reigns. But here’s something I have been considering for some time. I believe that there is a possibility of Bray Wyatt interfering in this match and setting up a program with Reigns. The safe pick here is Reigns, and I sincerely hope that this match ends any and all connection between these two.

Winner: Roman Reigns

John Cena (C) vs. Rusev – Russian Chain Match (United States Championship)

Clearly the ethnicity of the chain matters here. But if you watched Cena any time from 2003 to 2005, you should now how this match should end. Cena knows a thing or two about chains, and I’m pretty sure the Chain Gang will make its return this Sunday. The thing here, though, is where Rusev goes after he loses (let’s not get our hopes up about Rusev winning). This is where the danger lies in feuding with Cena. Sure, you may get a cheap victory here and there, but when you’re done feud with him, where do you go? Cena’s been the top guy since 2005, so feuding with him may be the equivalent to hitting your peak. Because after Cena, there’s everyone else. I get WWE wanted him to have a big WrestleMania match and I can sympathize with that. Yet, at the same time, there are risks to feuding with a guy with as much reaibility as Cena so early in his career. If I can make one more request, Cena needs to get rid of that poor excuse for a Stunner. It is really a disgrace to Stone Cold. Speaking of ripping off Stone Cold’s moves, seeing as how he can’t lock in the STF right as well, he should get rid of that while he’s at it.

Winner: John Cena

Nikki Bella (C) vs. Naomi – Divas Championship

Apparently Naomi has some attitude to go along with that booty. Now during the Brie Bella/Naomi match I took a piss break. I came back to find that the Bellas appeared to be faces. How long was I in the bathroom? I can’t be sure, but what I can be sure of is that WWE should capitalize Naomi’s heel persona. First, they need to change her music. Like, give her some ghetto Nicki Minaj stuff or something. I can’t take her seriously if I’m supposed to be dancing to her music. I think they should also let her speak more. I think she may have something in that regard. Whatever the case is, I believe WWE should put the strap on Naomi. This is just me. Whether or not its her time is up for debate, but with Paige and AJ out of the scene for now, I think we need a new face for the Divas division, and Nikki has held the title long enough. Time to move on. 

Winner: Naomi

Seth Rollins (C) vs. Randy Orton – Steel Cage Match (WWE World Heavyweight Championship)

If Randy really wanted to make this an even playing field, he should have just banned The Authority altogether. If Joey and Jamie can climb Hell In A Cell, I’m pretty sure they can climb and interfere in a cage. With Kane as “Guardian of the Gate” (how clever), I’m going to take a wild guess and assume he’s going to play into the finish. I’m sure Seth will be walking out victorious. Seeing as how there has been some visible tension between Seth and Kane, whether or not Kane costs Orton the title is anyone’s guess, but this is another match Bray can interfere in. I am just saying. Seth and Orton have great chemistry in the ring together, so I’m expecting an awesome bout between the two. I’m also looking to see how Orton will adjust his moveset with the RKO no longer in play. I can see him using the punt kick, but if WWE isn’t allowing Seth to use his Curb Stomp any more, the hypocrisy would be over 9000. I guess we will have to wait and see for ourselves. As a random side note, any notice how Rollins’ attire and his yellow and black hair matches perfectly with the black and gold WWE Title? Just me?

Winner: Seth Rollins

You guys know what the deal is. I’ll have match ratings and a review of the show after this Sunday, pending my Internet connection. Until next time. 

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