My name's Lucas Axl Chapel and I'm a gypsy. I'm not your Rock 'n' Roll rebel without a cause, there's method to my madness, not that you care. I enjoy crashing cars a bit too much.
I'm a knuckle crackin', booze drinkin', sea food eating', cocktail stick chewin', piss takin', shit chattin', drug takin', time wastin', Metal listenin', horror watchin', monster lovin' creature of the night!
It's not who you know, it's what you know and I'm a damn sight smarter than you, because knowledge is power.
It's always been my dream to be an alternative DJ and to do a spot of modelling in my spare time for fun (because we all love gettin' our picture taken don't we?). When I'm old I want to own a chain of Heavy Metal bars across the UK. Watch this space Hard Rock Caffe!
I hate down-to-Earth people. A lot.
I don't like animals; sometimes I pretend to myself that I do, but deep down I don't. They're not cute and they're taking us for a ride, playing dumb all the time.
People who use the word "pretentious" are either extremely boring or plain just not very good.
I enjoy doing things that I shouldn't, but that boils down to the fact that I could give a flying fuck about anyone or anything including myself. If somthing's illigal, it's usually only made illigal to spoil my fun. I tend not to get on with religious people. I think it's funny when people kick kittens. I genuinely do like my friends; I don't tell them too often because it sounds gay. I really enjoy media and it's somthing I'm very good at. I think rock music, particularly metal is one of the most important things in life. If someone's got a problem, I'm the worst person to come to because I'll stait up laugh in your face. I'm not racist or sexist because I hate everyone the same; I do not show predujice to certain groups of people, I'm just a completle cunt to everyone.
My music taste is better than yours.
I ♥ Rock 'N' Roll.
I'm so metal, I shit thumb tacks; metal music is something that means the world to me. If someone likes metal then they're in my good books as far as I'm concerned. I'm into everything from Nightwish to Cannibal Corpse; from Twisted Sister to Slipknot. I also love older metal like Black Sabbath, Deep Purple and Rainbow.
I don't take criticism well at all.
People think I'm racist and sexist, but they find out I'm not when they get to know me. I don't do any exersize that doesn't involve lifting a pint glass to my mouth.
...I hate standing in dog-shit, but then it's more satifying when I kick someone.
Rob Zombie films are safe as fuck.
Trust me, you like me a lot more than I like you.
...And that's what happens when you bite the biscuit.