JBW's official show thread

[Kashdinero]

Ron Burgundy is in the ring, and he is decked out in full camouflage army uniform with the helmet to boot.

The fans in attendance are going crazy

"JBW... JBW"

"JBW... JBW"

"JBW... JBW"

Ron mouths "wow" and looks around at the fans in attendance. As usual, many of them have brought their signs with them.

Krato$DineroWithAPairOfClippers
>
TheSoonToBeStubbleOfZeus

Kevin Mathews molested me too!

Marry me Larry

Fight Back Sly!

EWNCW ruined my life

I'm worthy!

Gillz--WTF!

Gas Masks FTW!

V3 OWN ALL

K-Flare for co-presidents

Sau is twisted

T1CG drank my grandmothers piss

R(ob) licked my window.

K-Jams cum-rag
>
EWNCW

Shuri needs help

Brick killed Kenny

Where's Straights?

This show is a whole week late.

Ron Burgundy: Wow.. Just, wow. What a turn out here tonight on what is the eve of a war where only one company can come out on top. A war where one company will be dominant, and one company will get dominated. Now, people, who will be the ones doing the dominating?

"JBW... JBW"

"JBW... JBW"

That's right people, JBW... As you may have seen, but, not as half as many as will hear now, there will be three JBW vs EWNCW PPV's, and the names and dates have yet to be announced, but suffice to say, we're ready for war. But, first, we have a SUPERSHOW to get through, and, my, what a SUPERSHOW it will be. For a start, for the first time ever, SHOWDOWN! have been invited, and we will be holding a battle royal to determine the number one contender to the SHOWDOWN! Heavyweight Championship. We will also be having a triple threat match for the Horrorcore Championship between the champion NightWolf, and the two menaces taking the Horrorcore Division by storm, Macabre and The Butcher. Last, but certainly not least, I have the honour and distinction of announcing to the world that due to the abundance of female talent, we here at JBW would like to announce the birth of the...

BOMBSHELL DIVISION!

That's right, people, we will be holding a tournament right here tonight, to determine the first ever JBW Bombshell Champion!

But, we can't have a SUPERSHOW without an announce team, so, lets meet our hosts.

Peter Griffin

"Kiss my ass! Haha, I'm just playing with ya', people, I'm your host for the evening, and. I'd like to apologise in advance for my co-announcers. They are a whole different level of lame, but, they are what they are. Anyway, take it away...

Joe Swanson.

"There is nothing lame about me, apart from my legs, I guess. But, wow, what a blockbuster announcement! I can't believe we're going to crown the first ever JBW Bombshell Champion! I bet my good friend sitting next to me is excited about this.. What do you say...?..

Glen Quagmire.

"Giggity Giggity Goo!! This is the best thing that JBW has ever done! I sure hope I can contain myself throughout this thing, because, whew, I'm getting kind of hot already! Before I bust a nut in here, I'm gonna hand over to our Mayhem announce team, take it away...

Pat.

"Thank you, Glen, and, I love how we can still be creative and innovative in the face of the coming war with the opposition. This Bombshell tournament is going to be off the hook. Panda has been dominating the competition here, and I see no reason why that should change tonight. Right...

Dudley Ramirez"

"You have got to be kidding me!? With how dominating Sasha has been here in JBW, my money is on her. And, that's not to mention how Pauley Cadillacs main squeeze, Marie Piscatelli is one of the greatest things to grace a JBW ring in a long time.. But, now, for the first time ever, I'd like to give a warm reception to a man who I have been dying to work with ever since he began announcing on SHOWDOWN! Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you..

Larry Zybsko"

"Who's cock do I have to sniff a line off to get a drink around here? Man, this place is worse than the bar at the Cambodian Midget Brothel I was at about an hour before we came on the air! Anyway, its time to hand over to my SHOWDOWN! Co-announcer -- a man who has the charisma of a dead ring-rat in my ten dollar a night motel room..

Sly Sylvesterstien"

"Believe it or not, folks, that was a compliment compared to what he usually says about me. Now, before we start our evenings tournament, I have to direct your attention to the JabeTron."

BD: Well, Cena won the match, but a vicious assault by Zeus after the match with that sledgehammer!! Really sending out a statement!!

Bod: And now look who’s coming in to gloat. The lousiest champ in EWNCW history!!

*Matthews enters the ring to congratulate TBOZ, and he raises his hand. They seem to be talking about something. Suddenly, TBOZ goes to the outside and grabs a couple of steel chairs. He hands one to Matthews, and points to the fallen Cena and Rich, both of whom are stirring and trying to get to their feet. Matthews nods in agreement with a smile on his face, he turns to get ready to hit Cena with the chair as he’s getting up, but BAM!! TBOZ slams the chair across the back of Matthews, before delivering another to his head!! He hands the chair to Cena, before going to pick up his sledgehammer again. Rich grabs the ther chair befor joining Cena in laying into Matthews who is now writhing in pain on the canvas. TBOZ can be heard shouting “You will NEVER come back here! You hear me! NEVER! You’re a stupid little man!! Hit him Cena!! HIT HIM!!” *

BD: My God! This is a vicious savage beatdown!

Bod: It’s no more than that son of a bitch deserves!! Is there another steel chair handy here? I fancy a few shots myself!!

*They continue to beat down Matthews relentlessly. TBOZ shouts “Pick him up boys!!” Cena and Rich pick Matthews up and hold him up in one corner while TBOZ stands in the opposite corner with his sledgehammer. Cena and Rich then irish whip him towards TBOZ, as TBOZ rushes towards him aiming the hammer at Matthews’s head!! Matthews lays motionless in the ring as the 3 men stand over his broken body. TBOZ now has a mic.*

TBOZ: Let that be a lesson to everyone from JBW who thinks they are safe coming here!! NOBODY will be jumping back and forth here!! It’s EWNCW vs JBW, and that’s the way it stays, so JBW!! Take back your little runt here!!

BD: My God!! Talk about sending a message!!

Bod: Ohhh, that was utter bliss!!! Makes me want to lace up the boots again!!

PK: Well maybe you will Bodom!! Who knows!! We’re all in this war, and we might all have to fight!!

BD: Indeed gentlemen! But the battle lines have been drawn, and we are now at war!! This is all the time we have tonight gentlemen, but stay tuned to the EWNCW thread to keep up with all the developments as they happen!! But from Louisiana, it’s goodnight from us folks!!

[Kashdinero]

Sly: As you can see, people, Kevin Mathews apparently had enough of being called a "developmental" talent, and much like Daniel May, he decided he no longer wanted to be subjected to being tormented by That One Creepy Guy... Ka$h had this to say on the whole matter.

Ka$hDinero: Oh, don't worry, he's totally one hundred percent fired. Fuck Kevin Mathews! We only had him on the roster because DUBS lost his mind and invited him here, and he's been nothing but a huge pain in the arse ever since... So long, Kev, and good fucking riddance, ya' little moose shagging shit nugget!

Peter: Ha! What a loser that Kevin Mathews is!

Joe: Yeah, he totally blew it there. Big time.

Larry: What's wrong with shagging a moose?

Quagmire: I was thinking the same thing.

Joe: Lets move on, people, this is getting a bit uncomfortable for us normal people. Now, as a favour to HolyJose, for letting him use the name SuperFly, Ka$h has invited five of AWF's top stars.

The camera pans across the front row, and sitting to the left of the announcers are none other than Jason Alexander, Depri$e, DJ Black, Erick Alexander, and Axxel Sonn.

Pat: Wow, talk about being a nice guy. Last I remember, Ka$h had a bit of beef with another Ka$h, and in the end, one of those young men in attendance had to change their name.

>>>>>><<<<<<

We cut backstage to BellaDonna who is getting a tattoo on her arm saying "JBW".

BD: So I heard that JBW is finally having a Women's Champion..pfft about freaking time. Although I have been in JBW for a couple of months now, the almighty powers that be have yet to even book me in match, can you believe it? Well that just shows the level of bias against me and The Prophecy.

BellaDonna checks her tattoo.

BD: Yeah looking good. Anyway, both myself and Proph have been disrespected in this company, but when I finally get the chance to compete for the first time, I will blow you all away. Oh and not the same type of blowing that the other women here in JBW do to get a"head" in this company.

The tattooist finishes on her tattoo, BellaDonna stands up.

BD: Its time that the women of JBW see just how much of a badass I am, not only do I have the greatest superstar in JBW The Prophecy in my corner, but I am also the best women's wrestler in JBW. Im sick of Prima donnas, its time for BellaDonna.

BellaDonna shoves the camera out of the way.

>>>>>><<<<<<

Zap Alderman is shown in his office, looking over some paper work when the door opens. Mr. Santiago and Vanquero walk in to frame. Zap looks up and sighs

Zap: Look guys, I'm not going to take a damn bribe so you two can get into a Tag Team Title match. Understand?

Vanquero starts to lift up what looks like a briefcase but Santiago stops him

Santiago: Who the hell said anything about a bribe? What we came here for was to ask how you wanted us to assist your certain situation right now.

Zap: What situation?

Santiago: EWNCW

Zap: (laughs a bit) Who said there's any situation with that?

Santiago: Hell, I don't know. Maybe all those perras trying to ruin Expect the Unexpected? The battle that ensued from it? Ringing a bell there boss? I'm just saying that La Mafia Mejicana can be a big help to you. On your word, one phone call from me and that perra Tommy Thunder will be in the ocean wearing...

Zap: No...I don't want you to whack anybody for me. If a situation arises, we will combat it the way JBW knows how and that's showing EWNCW how dominate JBW is in every aspect of professional wrestling. Now if you'll excuse me gentlemen I'm kind of busy.

Santiago: Just remember Mr. Alderman, one phone call. Come on Vanquero.

Zap: I'll try to forget before I'm forced to testify.

Santiago and Vanquero are leaving as two more men walk in They are Nick Riot and Bill Bastion of The Nasty Crew

Bill: Look who it is Nick! Cheech and Chong!

Nick: Big fan of your movies guys.

Santiago: Go fuck yourselves!

Bill grabs Santiago by the shirt of his suit

Zap: Hey! If your going to do that shit, get out of my office!

Bill lets go of Santiagos shirt. Santiago fixes it and walks away.

Bill: Hey boss! How's it hanging?

Zap: It's cold outside! Not really hanging much at all. Is there a sign on my door?

Nick: (confused) Yeah

Zap: What does it say?

Bill: Currently in meeting...

Zap: Now I have a question to ask, how in the hell does that translate into, "Please come in and interrupt my meeting."

Bill: Look Zap we just came by to let you know that you got two of the baddest sons of bitches on your side and if you need us to do anything with this whole EWNCW situation, all you have to do is ask.

Zap: Thanks Nick. Thanks Bill. I'll keep that in mind.

Nick: Good. Now we need to go get some more beer. We're playing a game of strip poker with Selena and damn does she suck at cards.

Zap: She's probably doing it on purpose guys. Watch out for her! From what I heard, she can be quite cunning and manipulative.

???: What was that Zap?

Zap looks up and sees The Alpha Dog standing at the door with his arm around Selena. Nick and Bill turn around and look

Nick: Son of a bitch Alpha! We already had her top and her skirt off!

Alpha: What can The Alpha Dog say guys? He has an appointment and he would hate to keep his favorite client waiting.

Selena: But your going to anyway.

Alpha: The Alpha Dog needs to talk to Zap for a bit. Don't worry. The Alpha Dog will be along to dominate you shortly.

Selena: You better be!

Selena and The Nasty Crew walk out of the room and Alpha turns to Zap

Zap: Damn it! What do you want Alpha?

Alpha: Why hasn't JBW done anything about them?

Zap: Done anything with who Alpha?

Alpha: EWNCW!!! THOSE BITCHES WHO INVADED EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED!!!

Zap: Settle down Alpha. Now we don't know what's going on but we're keeping a close eye on it.

Alpha: Really? How about this...how about The Alpha Dog just goes over there and destroys the entire roster for you?

Zap: Alpha, there is no need for anything that drastic. If they're going to attack, we're going to wait for it but I seriously doubt they will because they will be attacking our home turf which would be a stupid move.

Alpha: Are you kidding? Of course those jackasses are going to be back. They got to see the other night that the grass is much greener on the other side and watched the greatness that JBW is. What in the hell do they have to look forward going back over there? Tommy Thunder? Kingstream? It's like talking to an ass and a child. None of those bitches over there can hold a candle to The Alpha Dog, let alone the entire JBW locker room! Zap...The Alpha Dog...wants...action.

Zap: And you'll get it...if they try to come over here again. Not before.

Alpha starts to walk towards the door without saying anything

Zap: I mean it Alpha. Don't do anything crazy or I will fire your ass.

Alpha: (turns and looks at Zap) Oh come on Zap! When has The Alpha Dog ever done anything crazy?

[Kashdinero]

>>>>>><<<<<<

Out come's K-Jammin, dancing all over the place HBK style wearing another brand T-Shirt that read's "K-Jam > JBW > Bag of Crap > EWNCW". He throws his World Championship on the ramp and starts humping it, he climbs into the ring, flexes and his pyro goes off.

KJ: I am a two time World Champion bitchessssssssssssssssssssss!!!! *crowd erupts with boo's* First things first, George, do I like you? Fuck no, but you proved that you can hang with me in the ring. Hell, im not stupid. I know that if the EWNCW wankers didn't interfere then I may not be standing here with the World Heavyweight Championship. But what's done is done, that why im so damn successful at this wrestling shiz, if I see a window open then you better believe no matter how high up it is, im leaping through that motherfucker. Now onto Extremely Weak Nutsacks & Cock Wrestling, otherwise known as EWNCW. Just because your company's ratings are as shit as your wrestlers, don't give you assclowns the right to show up on MY turf and steal my air time. I ain't gonna stand here and thank you for showing up and distracting George, because I would have found anyway to beat George, I would have pissed and shat in his face if it meant I became World Champion again, so if your expecting a thank you, you can get fucked. You see, if this cross promotion war does happen, then you better believe I will be right there at the front line fighting with JBW, because if JBW goes under then that means I'll either be unemployed or I'll have to join you guys and you can barely afford spaghetti. In fact, I'll issue a challenge right now to any of you EWNCW fatherfuckers, I don't care if it's Tommy Tubby, The Pubes Of Zeus, Bag of McCoys, Strange Bastard, Daymian " Period "Bloodstone, Krystian " Fuck look at my face! Now that's a... " Krysys, Oh shit... I've just realised im going through all these names and you all have no idea who they are, I mean why would you? No one watches there shows. I'll take you through a little guide, If you would all please direct your attention to the JabeTron...



This is Tommy Tubby, he left EWNCW a while ago in controversial fashion to focus on his career as a KFC floor sweeper, but after management cought young Tommy making love to a family bucket, he got the boot and returned to EWNCW.



This is a mugshot of The Pubes of Zeus, this was taken 2 months ago after he broke into a children's hospital to explain and also show why he is called The Pubes Of Zeus, the reason he gave was simply " Zeus is fictional, as are my pubes "

[Kashdinero]

This is Billy " Bag of " Mccoy's, the reason for this name? He believes that eating a bag of Mccoy's crisps gives him superhuman sexual powers, which he finds useful when fucking Susan Boyle up her stinker.



This is Strange Bastard, I know he look's like a pussy but don't let that fool you. Once that snot drips down his nose he's a hard bastard! By hard, I mean he get's an erection. The snot turns him on, in fact you can view more pictures of him on www.fuckmysnot.com.



This scary motherfucker is Daymian " Period " Bloodstone, at aged 6, young Daymian was fed tampons by his 45 year old school teacher as punishment for taking a shit on the school hamster. He then got a taste for period blood, and goes out every Friday night hunting for it.



This beautiful man is Krystian " Fuck look at my face! Now that's a... " Krysys. I know I know, he's stunning. Krystian was actually a finalist in the "Mr.World" Junior division in 2006, only to be beaten by Colonel Said Gaddafi.

So yeah, that's just some of the EWNCW guys. Threatening bunch of lads aren't they? Giving me the chills just looking at them. Now I've graced you all with my presence for far too long, im off to get a Subway. Hit my music, I fancy a dance.

(owned.)

Dudley: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!! EWNCW are not fucking worthy! That was HILARIOUS! Krysys made me laugh the most!! El Oh El, K-Jammin!!

The commentators agree amongst themselves, until Peter says.

Peter: Lets get this tournament on the road![/COLOR]

[Kashdinero]

Bombshell Tournament First Round Match
Tracey vs Ayako

Traceys got goodies? More like fungus!

Quagmire: It's like this tournament was made just for me. Giggity!

Pat: Actually Quagmire, I would like to think that this tournament was made to showcase our amazing Womens division. These ladies work hard for JBW and I feel they deserve to be recognized.

Quagmire: Nope, just for me. Giggity Giggity Goo! Ow!

Joe: Nice selfish comment there Quagmire. This is the first round match to the tournament and it's going to be this harlot going one on one with everybody's favorite little asian...

Quagmire: Giggity!

Joe: Ayako. Remember the restraining order I had to give to you Quagmire.

Dudley: What are you talking about Joe? Tracey seems like a very respectable and classy lady.

Peter: Very funny Dudley. Did she give you a bj to say that? From what I heard, she's done more for less.

Ayako

Peter: Ayako is who I'm pulling for in this thing! She can be like a box of kittens one moment then become a nest of wasps the next.

Dudley: Well, it takes more than being cute and having a moments fury to make it in a JBW ring.

Pat: That's true Dudley, but she has proved many times that she can stand with the toughest ladies in JBW.

Quagmire: Alright guys let's get this started. The first round of the Bombshell Tournament begins now!



Peter: And Ayako wins it with a wicked submission!

Pat: What a great match to start this epic tournament!

Dudley: Tracey wasn't prepared damn it! She was distracted!

Peter: Yeah, by some mans dick. That moves Ayako up to the semi finals. Now it's time for the second match of this awesome tournament where Selena will take on Sasha!

Bombshell Tournament First Round Match
Selena vs Sasha

She tasty like a raindrop. Just ask The Alpha Dog!

Quagmire: Alpha Dog is a lucky bastard. But Selena did kiss me last week.

Peter: And if she did that to you, then just imagine what's she's doing with The Alpha Dog.

Dudley: I don't even want to imagine what's she's doing with him. Go on ahead Joe! You called Tracey a harlot earlier! What in the hell does that make Selena?!

Joe: A woman who is open about her sexuality. Nothing really wrong with that. Tracey does what she does just to get attention and from what past events have shown us, to get someone to pay here bills.

Sasha is ambitious

Quagmire: Here comes one of the original female wrestlers here in JBW! Sasha kicks ass and looks good doing it.

Pat: The only thing she has proved to be to me is a bully. She treats the rest of the women like shit and is a very poor example to little girls out there.

Quagmire: Good thing JBW isn't targeting kids.

Joe: Good thing we have that sentence to justify the bad things that happen here. Let's just get this match underway.


(Ignore past 8:38)

Pat: Oh come on! She pulled the trunks!

Quagmire: She did what she had to do to win this match. This is an important tournament for them and she decided that it was worth it to bend the rules a bit.

>>>>>><<<<<<

A prerecorded video package is presented on the JABETron, as it shows the New Japan Dojo

Shuriken: Welcome back, JBW fans and friends! I'm here at the New Japan Dojo, ready for some training and to show EWNCW how I train. So please! Make yourselves at home and enjoy the visit!

JBW staff goes in the Dojo and sets up cameras looking at the ring.

Shuriken: Thank you for coming! You got us at a good time. We are about to train! So lets get started....

Shuriken faces three students and he tells student number one to take him down, the student bows and both Shuriken and the student spar and Shuriken takes him down.

Shuriken: Good job. Just a bit more and you will do it.

pats student number one's back.

Next student!

Student number two bows and faces Shuriken. They both spar and the student takes down Shuriken.*

Shuriken: Excellent! Excellent! Great work!

Student number two helps Shuriken to his feet

Arigato. Next student!

The last student bows and faces Shuriken in a spar. They both start grappling and reversing each others grapples. They continue to chain wrestle until the last student kicks Shuriken's chest

Hahaha....great work....ow...argh....Alright I am ok!

JBW officials and students clap about quick recovery

Shuriken: Yeah I am ok! Students you did a good job in the sparring and I see that you have been training well! I'm proud of you. Now we shall start the training!

Shuriken instructs his students in various exercises for an hour as JBW officials and reporters look on Shuriken's exercise hell but the video showed exercise highlights

Shuriken: Ah that was a workout! Now any questions? Yes?

JBW reporter: What will you do against Gillz, an old EWNCW wrestler that has been talking down at you?

Shuriken: Hmm....

stands up and instructs his first student up and center in the ring

I'll probably to this to him....

delivers a destructive kick to his face, instantly KO-ing him.

Oh dear....I did it too much.....you two take him away.

the other two students takes the first student to the rest area

Shuriken: I will be there shortly and apologize....next question.

JBW reporter: What about Tommy Thunder?

Shuriken: *sighs for a moment* I don't know to be honest....I have a problem against Tommy at the moment....he has been running his mouth against me. With his claims that I left EWNCW....like abandoned it. I am here in this dojo and I am about to tell you that I haven't left anything. I have moved on and I know why I truly left EWNCW. I left it for one reason only but that information will stay in me so I won't share it. Next question.

JBW Reporter: And TBOZ?

Shuriken: Ahh yes....TBOZ....a lot of people said I have changed but....that man has changed for the worst...I don't know why the change but he has a problem against me. Every single EWNCW wrestler has a problem with me and I don't blame them. But I will say this: I was never the good guy from the beginning. I was merely following my path. I had my own interests....interests that were big. I am not in it for the money or glory....this here....the dojo....this is where I come and put some of my demons to rest. This is where I truly shine. Teaching students, not just about wrestling, but about respect and honor. But it has been brought to my attention that the EWNCW guys said that I was lacking "honor" and "respect". I will say this: There is no honor in this little war, EWNCW. There is no honor in starting this war. And you have lost my respect for you....I thought I taught EWNCW respect....but I see it went out the window when I left....saddening.....I'm going to beat respect in to every EWNCW wrestler I encounter. This interview is done. Thank you for coming.


>>>>>><<<<<<

Peter: Holy fudgecakes, Shuri' is ready for this war against those assholes. Wow, sucks to be his student![/COLOR]

[Kashdinero]

Bombshell Tournament First Round Match
Tracey vs Ayako

Traceys got goodies? More like fungus!

Quagmire: It's like this tournament was made just for me. Giggity!

Pat: Actually Quagmire, I would like to think that this tournament was made to showcase our amazing Womens division. These ladies work hard for JBW and I feel they deserve to be recognized.

Quagmire: Nope, just for me. Giggity Giggity Goo! Ow!

Joe: Nice selfish comment there Quagmire. This is the first round match to the tournament and it's going to be this harlot going one on one with everybody's favorite little asian...

Quagmire: Giggity!

Joe: Ayako. Remember the restraining order I had to give to you Quagmire.

Dudley: What are you talking about Joe? Tracey seems like a very respectable and classy lady.

Peter: Very funny Dudley. Did she give you a bj to say that? From what I heard, she's done more for less.

Ayako

Peter: Ayako is who I'm pulling for in this thing! She can be like a box of kittens one moment then become a nest of wasps the next.

Dudley: Well, it takes more than being cute and having a moments fury to make it in a JBW ring.

Pat: That's true Dudley, but she has proved many times that she can stand with the toughest ladies in JBW.

Quagmire: Alright guys let's get this started. The first round of the Bombshell Tournament begins now!



Peter: And Ayako wins it with a wicked submission!

Pat: What a great match to start this epic tournament!

Dudley: Tracey wasn't prepared damn it! She was distracted!

Peter: Yeah, by some mans dick. That moves Ayako up to the semi finals. Now it's time for the second match of this awesome tournament where Selena will take on Sasha!

Bombshell Tournament First Round Match
Selena vs Sasha

She tasty like a raindrop. Just ask The Alpha Dog!

Quagmire: Alpha Dog is a lucky bastard. But Selena did kiss me last week.

Peter: And if she did that to you, then just imagine what's she's doing with The Alpha Dog.

Dudley: I don't even want to imagine what's she's doing with him. Go on ahead Joe! You called Tracey a harlot earlier! What in the hell does that make Selena?!

Joe: A woman who is open about her sexuality. Nothing really wrong with that. Tracey does what she does just to get attention and from what past events have shown us, to get someone to pay here bills.

Sasha is ambitious

Quagmire: Here comes one of the original female wrestlers here in JBW! Sasha kicks ass and looks good doing it.

Pat: The only thing she has proved to be to me is a bully. She treats the rest of the women like shit and is a very poor example to little girls out there.

Quagmire: Good thing JBW isn't targeting kids.

Joe: Good thing we have that sentence to justify the bad things that happen here. Let's just get this match underway.


(Ignore past 8:38)

Pat: Oh come on! She pulled the trunks!

Quagmire: She did what she had to do to win this match. This is an important tournament for them and she decided that it was worth it to bend the rules a bit.


Larry: OK, now that SHOWDOWN! isn't being treated like Lita in a gym full of fat Mexicans, I think it's time we show the fucking world what the SHOWDOWN! boys are all about!!

>>>>>><<<<<<

RedRuM is seen walking in the back. He's got his SHOWDOWN! Television Championship over his shoulder and is stopped by Todd Stevenson for an interview.

Todd: "Mr. RedRuM, How do you feel about everything going on between JBW and EWNCW? You've been put into a Battle Royal later on tonight between all of the SHOWDOWN! roster, do you expect to win the match?

RedRuM: "You damn muthafuckin' right I'ma win that match! Those little bitches ain't got shit on me in that ring, in the back or on tha' streets! I'ma kick all they asses and get my next level shit on! I'm comin' for that muthafuckin' SHOWDOWN! Championship!!! I'd like to have a muthafuckin' centerpiece around my damn waist like that!!"

RedRuM goes to walk away but is stopped by Todd. RedRuM turns around with a crazy look in his eyes.

RedRuM: "Why tha' fuck you stop me, nigga!?!?!?"

Todd: "Well, you never answered my first question and I have another one for you too...."

RedRuM: "NIGGA!! What do I think of EWNCW??? FUCK THEM NIGGAS!!! I'MA GET THAT NIGGA THAT FUCKIN' STABBED ME AN' SHIT TOO!! THAT Captain Swallow BITCH!! SHOW YO'SELF TONIGHT BITCH!!! SHOW YO'SELF!!!"

RedRuM storms off and Todd follows behind trying to continue the interview but 'RuM is walking fast. Finally he turns a corner and stops in his tracks. Todd and the cameraman catch up to see Alpha Dog playing with his cell phone not even noticing 'RuM, Todd and the cameraman.*

Alpha Dog: "Look, The Alpha Dog knows you deliver to arenas!! Alpha's had takeout from this place the LAST TIME we were here! Alpha's hungry! You have Asian and Alpha wants Asian!!!.... What do you mean you have a file on Alpha?... What type of file??? WHAT!...... WHAT!!!...... Okay... Alpha's done that... what? No... Alpha doesn't like Hermies... ewww.... Alpha may like that though..."

*Alpha Dog looks up and notices everyone standing there. He quickly puts his phone away and stares at RedRuM.*

Alpha Dog: "Well, if it isn't one of the dominated!! RedCuM!! How does it feel to be rode like a bitch?? Alpha has dominated you not once but, TWICE!!! You may have gotten a one up on Alpha before by hitting him in the back but, everytime were face to face, ALPHA DOMINATES!!!!"

Alpha Dog gets in RedRuM's face. 'RuM puts his Television Championship down and steps right to Alpha's face.

RedRuM: "Fo' real, nigga? Yeah? You DOMINATED me? Like hell nigga!! You cheapshotted my ass too!! FUCK YOU ALPHA MUTT!!! You keep dodging my ass face-to-face so, we gon' keep talkin' or we gon' get fuckin' shit up like we do best?"

RedRuM throws the first hit and connects with Alpha's face. As Alpha falls back into the wall, 'RuM goes to kick Alpha with his big boot. As Alpha moves his phone falls and 'RuM's boot connects with it instead shattering it on the wall. Alpha takes the advantage of 'RuM's leg being in the air and punches him as hard as he can in the ribs.

'RuM goes down to one knee and Alpha goes to hit the double ax handle on 'RuM but he moves and Alpha hits the floor. 'RuM picks up a piece of the phones screen and rakes it across Alpha's face. Alpha picks up some nearby sound equipment and bashes it into 'RuM's face repeatedly. 'RuM staggers back and when Alpha goes for the final hit, 'RuM hits a drop toe hold and Alpha's face goes right into the box onto the ground.

With a loud thud, 'RuM is on top of Alpha punching the back of his head. 'RuM gets up and grabs a sound cable. He makes a noose out of it and goes to hang Alpha from it, Alpha moves as sound is cut out for a minute. Alpha stabs 'RuM with a sharpened pencil he just grabbed. While 'RuM is trying to figure out what happened, Alpha smacks him with a nearby holiday wreath. 'RuM gets pissed off and lariats Alpha. As Alpha goes down security finally shows up and separates them. Zap Alderman is on the scene as well.

Zapp: "Get these two out of here! They're ruining the SuperShow!! RedRuM, You're no longer competing in the SHOWDOWN! Battle Royal and Alpha Dog, one more out burst and YOU'RE SUSPENDED!!"

RedRuM: "You kickin' me out tha' building but lettin' this nigga' still stay??? Really? AW HELL NAW!!!!

'RuM goes crazy and strikes Alpha and Zapp at the same time. Security pulls him back and Alpha Dog retaliates. Zapp tries to calm Alpha down while RedRuM is being dragged out of the building screaming.

RedRuM: "I'ma fuck all ya'll nigga's up!!! BANK ON THAT SHIT!!! BANK ON IT!!"

[Kashdinero]

>>>>>><<<<<<

G-Scorp is at home in Melbourne, Australia Via Satellite

Sin, I did what I promised I would do on my YouTube promo
http://http://www.youtube.com/user/a.../0/XrpzqPXuiBY
I defeated him with then ref throwing down his hand 1… 2… 3… and I was declared the winner and then I proceeded to rip that mask of that demonic face of evil to reveal those nasty looking fangs and that scaly grey skin but then once again the lights went out he disappeared before I could unveil the true face of evil.

After that though, something much bigger happened, EWNCW once again invaded our show and tried to overrun showdown well G-Scorp is glad you did because he was previously told that he would not be needed in the war on EWNCW, but now you come onto my turf and think there won’t be repercussions well your wrong, you see G-Scorp is bigger, badder and better than ever before and he is going to meet fire with fire.

Now Sin… I have not finished with you as yet but first EWNCW needs to be stopped for the very existence of JBW, so to all my JBW roster team, especially May and Avidico, I want bygones to be bygones and we need to stick together in unity if we are going to stop EWNCW putting their rotten paws on showdown
Cause when you act like a bitch, the Top Dog bites and E-Wrestling News Championship Wrestling, if you don’t like that then come with me

>>>>>><<<<<<

Larry: I'll tell ya', for an Aussie, G-Scorp is a tough guy! He kinda reminds me of a cross between The Flying Kangaroos and The Sheepherders. I once got in a fight with a real life Kangaroo, but after I gave him head, he stopped kicking my ass. I tell ya', Peter, you haven't lived until you've tried Kangaroo cock.

Peter: I'll, uh, take your word for it, there, Larry.

>>>>>><<<<<<

Sully and Broc are shown backstage, near the interview area...where interview Joe Anderson is there, ready to ask them some questions

Anderson: So boys, how do you feel about this whole EWNCW issue?

Sully and Broc: What's a EWNCW?

Anderson: It's a-

Broc: Oh wait, is that one of those new, fancy talking picture boxes?

Sully: No wait, I think it's a type of sandwhich.

Anderson: No...it's actually one of JBW's rivals.

Sully: Oh wait! Isn't that Tommy Thunder guy on there?

Broc: What's a Tommy Thunder?

Sully: He's that guy...you know, the guy who sells the watches...

Anderson: No, that's not Tomm-

Broc: Wait, I thought he sold knives...

Sully: Pretty sure it was watches.

Anderson: Guys, EWNCW is actual-

Broc: Trust me...it was knives.

Sully: No...it...was...watches.

Broc: Knives....

Sully: Watch-es.

Anderson: Guys, just calm do-

Broc: KNIVES!!!

Sully: WATCHES!!!

The boys then begin to go at each other, grabbing at each other...wrestling each other to the ground. The two begin to fight, as Joe Anderson gives up and sneaks out the back.

>>>>>><<<<<<


The camera pans inside a door to see Kayden James seated in a dark locker room in front of a mirror

Kayden looks into the mirror and stares at the camera behind him

Kayden: Normally I'm a man of God. Normally I preach the words of my God. Normally I try to save weary souls. These are not normal times and these abnormal times call for abnormal actions. You see EWNCW, though I am not affiliated with Warfare and Mayhem, when you stepped foot in a JBW ring, you stepped foot into MY ring.

You are no longer dealing with Kayden James "minister unto the Lord", you are now dealing with Kayden James the man. This ring is where I fight, this ring is where I bleed, this ring is where I as a man settle my differences. You think you can just come here and do as you please? You will fail with this like you fail with any other thing. You.Will.Not.Survive

The JBW is united in this front and it matters not to me your race, your creed, or your gender. You will see what it's like to be in the presence of true talent. I will strip you of your pride, I will rob you of you confidence. I will put an end each and everyone of you, one at a time. Bring me your "best" and I will show you better. Bring me your strong and I will show you stronger. Bring me your "holy" and I will show you holier. The Archangel has spoken..

Kayden looks back down as the camera pans away

>>>>>><<<<<<

Larry: OK, so, there was Kayden. One of the best we got on our "mental to call it devopmental" program, he's totally fucking out there, but not as much as our champion Shining Light.

Sly: Listen to you, getting all educational, albeit in your own depressing style.

Slap to Sly!

Larry: It's called getting over, Sly.. Something you wouldn't have a fucking clue about. Back when wrestling was real wrestling I once slit my own wrists to get an angle over.

Sly: Lets hear from our champ.

>>>>>><<<<<<

So…. JBW is at war with EWNCW. Do I care? No, I don’t. I have my own problems to worry about at this moment of time, and I do not need petty child – like behaviour to distract me from my goals. The rivalry between JBW and EWNCW reminds me of Kindergarten, where children would argue about whose turn it was in the sandbox, or who stole their juice box. However, as Showdown Heavyweight Champion I feel that it is my duty to lead the other members of the roster into battle if they wish to do so. Forget RedRuM, forget Daniel May, and forget Kevin Matthews. I will be the one who leads Showdown into battle, although I will do it half – heartedly.

If Kayden James wishes to be a part of the Showdown Army, then he is welcome to. But if he is using this as an excuse to get closer to me and to punish me, then I will not stand for it. I am the Showdown Heavyweight Champion and I am determined to prove that Showdown is the best!

For as it is written in the Bible, “Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good”

Sly: Now that is a twisted guy. He and Kayden have been tearing it up in that ring against each other, but, have they got to put their differences aside if they want to play a factor in this war.

Larry: Ahh, what do you know about war? I fought in three world wars, two civil wars, and NAM! Anyway, it's time to go to some footage of me and my pal, Caesar.. Working out.

The camera fades in on Zbysko. He's drenched in sweat and staring at something directly off screen. He draws a fist back and starts wailing on the object, a punchbag-like thud being generated with every hit.

Zbysko: EWNCW my ass. Bunch of yellow-bellied, cancerous, mouthbreathers. (Big swing at the bag) Pickled brain morons. (Swings again) What? No opinion?

The camera pans around behind of Zbysko, looking over his shoulder. It focuses in on Caesar hanging upside-down, Zbysko wailing away at his abs. Caesar is well contain and dry as a bone while Zbysko is soaked in sweat.

Caesar: One does not acknowledge the peasants--even when they're rioting on your doorstep. If you don't know your place how can they know their's?

Zbysko: Fine. Are you at least worried about Redrum? He did beat you again.

Caesar: Just as lightning can strike the same spot twice, one man can pull out a miracle more than once. Defeat does not imply that one is better than their victim--only that they can be lucky. However... (Caesar swings himself up, sitting on the iron rod he was hanging from) I will not stand for a lower class slum to walk around with his head held high.

Zbysko: And how exactly do you plan to do that?

Caesar: As you should know, Larry: Beware the Ides of March.

Joe: Lets move on with this tournament. All this SHOWDOWN! crap is giving me gas.

[Kashdinero]

Bombshell Tournament First Round Match
Nikki Belzova vs Marie

She's going to kick some ass

Pat: Here comes Nikki and, in the third match of this tournament, she will be facing Marie.

Joe: Nikki is a tough chick. She's already beaten Marie once before. I can't imagine she would have a problem doing it again. She would make the force proud.

Dudley: I really hope Marie just whips Nikkis ass in this match. Mark my words Panda will not win this tournament.

Nikki: I was never much for words but tonight calls for me to speak a little bit about the first ever tournament for a Womens Championship hosted by JBW. First of all I just want to say that I am EXTREMELY excited to be given this once in a life time chance. I hope that everyone in attendance enjoys this tournament as much as I will. The girls better be ready for me!

She's a goodgal.

Quagmire: Giggity! Marie is my kind of lady!

Peter: You mean the kind of lady who has low inhibitions, don't care about their safety, and amazingly low expectations. Now I don't think much of Marie but I think she's a bit better than your kind of women.

Pat: Both ladies are in the ring. Let's get this match going!


(Ignore past 6:10)

Pat: And Nikki wins it with a beautiful Pandarama! That moves her to the semi finals of the Bombshell Tournament! What do you think Dudley?

Dudley: Yeah, well she won't get past her next opponent.

Joe: Well, that puts Nikki in the Semi Finals along with Sasha and Ayako, who will face each other later tonight, and Nikki will be facing the winner of this next match.

Bombshell Tournament First Round Match
Belladonna vs Rashid

Belladonna

Quagmire: This is the fourth match of the Bombshell Tournament and we are about to have an in ring debut. This is Belladonnas first match in JBW. I can't wait to see her in action in the ring...or under the blankets. OW!

Joe: Wow! Talk about being subtle Quagmire. I wonder what the relationship between Bella and The Prophecy is.

Pat: Can't imagine what it would be. Anyway, Belladonna has a chance to prove that she isn't just a pretty face here in JBW.

*Rashid comes out to the ring*


Pat: I can't believe she is even part of this tournament. After what she did to Polly Pablo, she shouldn't even be wrestling here anymore.

Joe: I tried to arrest her, but Nikki Belzova kicked her ass well enough at Expect the Unexpected so I figured she got her just deserves.

Peter: Well, putting aside personal feeling this match is a big opportunity for both of these ladies. This is a good way to show what you have to offer to JBW. Let's see how they do!



Quagmire: Belladonna wins it with a huge face slam. Very impressive!

Joe: That puts her in the semi finals and she will be taking on Nikki Belzova. Also in the semi finals it will Sasha taking on her nemesis Ayako! Now, lets here how them members of the SuperFly Division feel about this war.

>>>>>><<<<<<

Dylan Cross is Seen out Back Running Around Climbing the Equipment Towers and all the Production Gear.

Ricky Former Warfare Commentator turned stagehand and Kash's Bitch Shows up out of Breath

Ricky: Dylan ive Been Looking Everywhere for you. Kash Sent me to Tell you to Get your Promo Done. He is Waiting For it. So Stop Doing Your Little Monkey Flips and Get it Done.

Cross: Yea Yea Ricky ill get to it, Jeeze you Have Become Such a Grumpy Prick Since you got Demoted from Commentator to Stagehand. Sheesh ill Do it Now. Whats the topic?

Ricky: Ewncw. Kash wants you to shoot on Ewncw. It should of Been in Your PM

Cros: I Dont Read those. Give me Some Quick Fire.

Ricky: Okay if it gets Kash off My Back! Tommy Thunder!!!

Cross: Lenny Lightning Rip Off. Cant Wrestle, Boring Promos Next.

Ricky: Daymian Bloodstone!!!

Cross: Who?

Ricky: the EWNCW Ignition Champion

Cross: Oh the Midget, Yeah the Dude got Ring Skills but his Promos Put Me to Sleep.

Ricky: They Prefer to be Called Little People. Freak inc?

Cross: WHOA Keep em Away From Me. Aint No Way im Letting Them Drink my "Red Juice"

Ricky: Final Question! EWNCW in General

Cross: They are the Most Overrated, Most Boring Efed. Long way to go to Catch up with JBW. Maybe they Should Take Lessons on How to Put on a Good Show from Some of the Indies

Ricky: That Should be Enough. Kash is Waiting for his Bong and you Know how he Gets if he Doesnt get his 3 o Clock Fix.

Ricky Walks Off For Only Moments Later Be Seen Walking To the Camera Holding This.



Ricky: Might Need This.

Picks up the Camera and Runs Off

Cross: Strange Dude he Was

Dylan Goes back to Doing Flips off the Equipment. Next Minute a Huge Crash is Heard and Thousands of Dollars of Equipment is Broken on the Ground. Dylan Sprints Off Down the Hall Before Kash Finds Out

>>>>>><<<<<<

[Kashdinero]

The Jabetron cuts to Todd Stevenson sitting at the bar of what appears to be a nightclub. Behind the bar we see men, dressed in brightly colored clothes, dancing and making out on a dancefloor and it becomes apparent that we aren’t at a nightclub; we’re at a gay bar.

Todd:* Under his breath* I can’t fucking believe they made me come here. *Realizing the camera is rolling* Oh! Hello ladies and gentlemen, my name is Todd Stevenson and my guest at this time is former JBW Tag Team Champion and the owner of this fine establishment; TheDag.

Dag sits down next to Todd and kisses him on the cheek which causes Todd to nearly fall off his barstool. Todd regains his composure and starts to speak.

Todd: Jeez…Well thanks for that Dag…Now onto business. At Expect The Unexpected, you were a part of JBW’s army in the brawl with EWNCW and since then it has been announced that you have signed a JBW contract. My question is…Why? Why come back now?

Dag: You’re so cute, Todd; trying to act all professional. You know you want me.

Todd: All I want from you is an interview. Now can you please answer the question?

Dog: Oh no darling, I think you want much more than an interview.

Todd is visibly nervous at this point

As for your question sweetie, I came back because I miss rolling around on a mat with sweaty men.

Todd looks like he’s about to vomit now

You see my beautiful Todd, No amount of gay bars or male prostitutes were ever able to replace the feeling of being in the ring with another man while millions of people looked on.

Todd: *who is sweating profusely now* Jesus….Uh-Uh-Wha-What about EWNCW? What do you have to say to them?

Dag: Oh they’re nothing to worry about Toddy. Our roster is sexier, handsomer, and prettier than they could ever dream of. Although I do want to see these “Sexy Alpha Males” they have; they sound yummy.

Todd: O-O-Okay, I need to get the fuck out of here.

Dag: Are you sure you don’t want to come up to the VIP room? We’re gonna have funnnn….

With that, Todd throws up all over himself as the Jabetron cuts back to the arena.

It's the Number 1 Contender

B]the music hits, and none other than Felix Guerrero emerges from the back, and begins to walk to the ring[/B]

Dudley: Not this asshole again! Someone really needs to take this guy down a peg or two, and they need to do it quickly!

Peter: I freaking love this guy!

Felix: So.... who else saw that PPV? eh? I'm sure that night is going to be remembered as the night, that Felix Guerrero, became the #1 contender, for the SuperFly championship right? WRONG!!! my moment... was out shined, by EWNCW... yes, the 3rd best Company in the a feds, Hold on I've got something in my throat. *cough* HWA *Cough*

anyway... the moment that would have been remembered by the everybody, was oover shadowed by those EWNCW people, so for EWNCW, come get me, you all know you can't handle Felix, just like Avidico can't, I hope all of you guys are listening over there, to the BETTER fed, because any of you who think that EWNCW is better than the JBW.... need to look at your tags... just look at the one that says "the older not as good fed" because that is exactly what, the EWNCW is, they are nowhere near as good as the JBW, ya know why? because they don't have someone electrifying.... they don't have someone charismatic... they don't have someone with the greatest skills to ever grade this ring.... they don't have Felix Guerrero.. and until they do, they are not the better fed.. until they have Felix Guerrero, they are just a bunch of 13 year olds, wrestling on their trampoline in their back yard.

now, back to Avidico... you better shine that title nice for me, because soon, it will be mine.... and it will be, very soon

Felix drops the mike and heads backstage

>>>>>><<<<<<

Infernio is showen in the back staring at a camera

Okay how do you turn this thing on?

Drew the camera guy comes from off screen and presses a button

Drew: there you go Paul

Infernio: I TOLD YOU TO NEVER CALL ME BY MY REAL NAME
NOW GET OFF MY SCREEN
So now that the war has started everyone is expecting me to cut a promo ripping the shit out of EWNCW
So here goes
Ewncw You are a pathetic excuse for a company
you have self obsorbed writers that push themselfs over others Yea im looking at you tommy
bullshit talent that cant even wrestle aye gillz
and wrestlers that steal footballers names, talking about you ronaldo

All in all i dont give a fuck about who wins this war as long as at the end of it i get my shot at avidico for his title

Infernio picks up the camera and throws it at drew

Get this shit to kash and where is my fucken nachos

>>>>>><<<<<<

Roberto Pamich is standing in the ring.

[Kashdinero]

Roberto: What an unbelievable night it was at expect the unexpected, The whole night was outstanding and like the PPV read, We got the unexpected.

Before I go any further I just want to say to my older brother Uliose, congratulations on being the better man on the day…. Maybe you did show that you have been carrying me I guess we will see soon.

Now addressing the more important issue at hand and that is the invasion by EWNCW against our might JAY-BEE-DOUBLEU.

Crowd erupts into an almighty JBW chant

Now I know 95% of the roster has said that they are going to exact revenge and promise all these miraculous things they can do, well im not because clearly I am not at the top of the pecking order,

You have guys like Ma$$, St George, Jman, Holy Jose, Psycho Siaki and a bunch of other guys then we have our tag teams like Brickslayer and Icarus, Air Bu’, Two Of A Kind and a host of others I am merely a pawn in this war but in the game of chess a pawn can make or break a game and they are the front line of all attacks and I will put my heart and soul into this war and repay the favour that the JABE team have put in me by signing me up for the next year despite only having one tag match and one solo match for two losses, it means a lot too have a boss that has faith in you unlike EWNCW who didn’t even want a bar of Il Cattivo despite all of our success and prestige in European competition.. they didn’t even consider us for their competition and yet the far more accomplished then the originals of E-Fedding.

Now I will say we owe you a lot a you were the first to start when everyone said that E-Fedding could not be done and you guys stuck at it and created a juggernaunt which allowed our company to come into competition so thank you for endeavouring to take E-Fedding into this new era where in 2012 there will be no less then seven companies and 10 brands, but guys you just messed with the best of them and for that we are going to win this war and make EWNCW the New Millennium WCW

Now I would love to have Uli on my side for this war on EWNCW as I don’t care what you say brother, as a team we are better then two individuals, come on man im willing to put the attack behind me for the sake of the war.

**LONG PAUSE**

Please Uli for the sake of JBW put your ego behind you and join forces once again….

Its Uliose!

Uliose: So you wanna start a fresh do you Roberto???

Roberto: Yes for JBW’S sake

Uliose: Well I tell you what, we could join forces to take the EWNCW tag team champions Domination out

Roberto: Really….

Uliose: yeah hell why not come here you stupid wog

The Brothers hug in warm embrace as crowd sense a feel good moment and chant Il Cattivo

Then Roberto starts to leave the ring but as he is about to duck the ropes Uli brings out What looks like Brass Knucks and strikes him in the back of the head then for the second time in a week puts him in the Austro Submission and Roberto has been tapping for ages then his hand drops. Uliose gets up and spits on his brother.

Uliose: EWNCW how dare you, how dare you take away my time in the spot light and come over here and start an E-Fed war.

Who in the hell do you think you are, after 15 years of carrying my brother as the lesser half of Il Cattivo… I finally prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that I am simply better, not only then my brother but anyone in the Superfly division and more importantly, more then anyone in the ewncw roster .
Your not even important enough for me to be bothered capping your letters because compared to ULIOSE, ewncw is a small insignificant distraction in the Uli Push and im going to deal with you bastards, but im a little different to my inferiors here on JBW you see, they are doing this for the love of the company and lets be perfectly honest ok?
How many of you actually care about the company, hell I don’t ewncw I am gunning you guys as revenge and we are all well aware that the biggest son of bitch you can always hope to avoid is vengeance being cast upon your shadows and that’s exactly what you have done.
Do you actually think that you have the talent to take me on????? Come on seriously even Kevin Matthews or G-Scorp or hell even ROBERTO PAMICH can take you on and ive seen him lose to an oversized brown paper bag, basically you get the drift of what I am saying don’t you, I am going to exact revenge on EWNCW and then well then I am going to take out Avidico cause hell we know the Superfly roster here is weak if feeler gorilla I no 1 contender...im outta here war out.

>>>>>><<<<<<

Harry Richards is in the locker room, sitting on one of the benches

Harry: Wow, I sure picked an exciting night to make my debut. I’ve only had one match and I’ve already been a part of a huge interpromotional brawl. Now, due to my relative noobness, you may think I’m rather indifferent in the whole situation. Wrong, and it isn’t just due to me taking quite a few nasty shots in the ruckus at the PPV. I’m a lifelong Jabe fan, well, slight exaggeration; I’ve been a fan of the promotion for all of its lifetime. I don’t want to see show after show ruined by some EWNCW nobodies who think they are all that. I’m not going to let that happen. So yeah, I’m going to be fighting in every battle of this war, whether I’m fighting somebody my own size, which is unlikely, not many titches like me get into wrestling, or if I’m facing some seven foot monster, I think their resident giant goes by the name of Grind_Bitch or something, I’m going to be taking just as good as I get.

>>>>>><<<<<<

[B]The camera focuses on the announce team but before any of them can speak, they're interrupted by music.[/B}

It's the bastard from Boston

Peter: Well, that was just rude.

As the camera goes back to the entrance ramp, ARTEMIS ECLIPSE makes his way to the ring. The crowd is booing him pretty hard as he smiles while sliding in the ring. He stands up and poses to an extremely loud chorus of boos. He loves it and smiles more. He pulls a mic out of the pocket of his jeans but he stands there for another minute with the mic in the air letting the crowd boo. During that time, a small "Artemis, Artemis, Artemis!" chant brews up and he smiles again.

Artemis Eclipse: "You see this? You hear this? Amazing right? Wrong. See, I don't care and have never cared what you people do, say or whatever else happens from your insipid bodies. As far as I'm concrened, you pay your meger restitution and you come here to enjoy a show. I'm supposed to flip around the ring like a monkey and get paid... subsequently.. a lot more than you do but, I digress.

Either way, I've been told by my manage to come out here and say some things regarding what happened at the last PPV... EWNCW invaded us. A lot of people are pissed. Not I. See, I go off of competition. I'm down for whatever and there's nothing going to stop me from being me. I'm Artemis Eclipse... "The Homicidal Highflyer". There's a reason for that and if anyone from EWNCW wants to prove anything, come out to this ring and do so. I'm definitely not hard to find.

I am going to touch on another subject as well... Andy Amazing. You cost me the match at our last Pay-Per-View. You were the reason I wasn't able to get the pin. I've got unfinished business with you. But, apparently this war is more important than our OWN Championships in JBW. I guarantee you that I will not let us go through the cracks while this whole war is going on. See you when I see you, kid.

Artemis throws the mic at Peter, Joe and Quagmire and walks out. The boos never stopped and he just keeps smiling that devilish smile as he walks out holding his arms high into the air.

>>>>>><<<<<<