JBW's official show thread

[Kashdinero]

*Larry Zybsko comes staggering up to the announce table with a bottle of cheap vodka in his hand and a bag of what appears to be some kind of powder like substance*

Larry: Who the fuck are you? Where in the hell is that Jewbag motherfucker that normally does Showdown! with me? What the hell's the kid'sname? Sliver? Silver? HE FUCKED MY GOD DAMNED YETTI!

KJ: For one you old shriveled up fuck this isn't Showdown! For twoyou're about 3 seconds away from me slapping the stink right off of you. *Sniffs* Damn....I don't even know if I could slap you that hard...

Larry: *as he sits down at the announce table and puts on a headset* Lookie here you tea drinking, crumpet eating, Prince Charles cocksucking little prick I don't give a fuck what you call this show. As long as I'm here it's called Larryland. Larry fucking Zybsko Land.

KJ: Larryland? I bet you haven't even saw your "Larryland" since your President Reagan's administration you sick old fuck. God, Romes chose one hell of a time to go take a shit break....Those burritos today were absolutely brutal though...

Larry: *As he puts his face down in the bag of powder and snortshard* OH GODDDDD YEAHHH!!! WOOOOO!! Romes? Who the creepy crawly hell is Romes? Oh is he your boyfriend you little butt plugging ass slut? Yeah he is, isn'the? I bet you're the receiver to his bubba love. Does he do what Sheiky Baby does? Does he fuck your ass and make you humble?

KJ: *As he stands up and removes his headset* What the bloody hell did you just say to me? That's it motherfucker, I don't give a damn what you call yourself I'm about to absolutely fuck you up.

Larry: Oh calm down sister don't get your panties in a twist. Sit the fuck down, take a shot of this potato juice, and let's watch this stud of a man Caesar beat the holy hell out of this Bible thumping sissy.

KJ: One more cross word to me you drugged out fuck, that's all it's going to take for me to end you. Let's get this shit over with. Just as soon as Romes gets back fuckerhead, you're outta here. This should be an interesting match though. Here is our challenger for the Showdown Championship belt; Caesar.

*Caesar's Theme is played as he is led by Chariot to the ring*
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KJ: And here comes the Champ, the man called Shining Light

*As Shining Light's theme plays, a row of lit candles is set along the ramp. Shining Light walks out from under the Jabetron with a hooded shroud over his head covering his eyes but not his mouth and the Showdown World Championship around his waist. As he walks passed each set of candles, their light goes out until he makes it to the ring*



Larry: This is going to be good, I think my boy Caesar is about to beat the holy hell out of this religious freak. No thinking to it, I know he is.


　

Taker=Shining Light. Angle=Caesar. (Ignore the ending)

*Caesar has Shining light in a sick armbar in the middle of the ring and Light is fading fast. Kayden James comes running to the ring, slides under the ropes, and hits a reverse DDT on the ref as he's down checking on Shining Light. He then grabs Light's metal plated Bible and drives it deep into Caesar's skull, busting him wide open. He then drapes Shining's arm over Caesar*

... Larry: Oh fuck no...NO FUCKING WAY! NO FUCKING WAY AM I GOING TO LET THAT OTHER BIBLE FUCKING FREAK COST CAESAR WHAT IS HIS!! *Stands up,drops his headset, and runs to the ring*

*Larry runs down to the ring and slides in under the rope. He digs in his pants and pulls out the bag of white methamphetamine looking powder, grabs a handful of it, and throws it in Kayden’s eyes. James falls down almost instantly and rolls under the ropes onto the ground, trying frantically to dig the substance out of his eyes.
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In the ring, Shining Light is starting to get to his feet still favoring the arm that was wrenched by Caesar a few minutes earlier. Larry kicks Shining in the gut and DDT's him onto his own metal plated Bible then drapes Caesar's arm over him. Larry slides to the outside, revives the ref, and slides him into the ring. The ref counts 3 and this one is over. Larry slides back into the ring, helps Caesar up, and then out nof the ring.
　
Caesar has a look on his face that is pure unadulterated smugness as the fans pelt him with garbage on his walk back through the curtain.*

[Kashdinero]

K-Jam: Well, that was Larry... Can't believe Caesar won the SHOWDOWN! Heavyweight belt, though.. I'm not even too sure if I've seen him in a match before. Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever watched an episode of SH- Oh, what now?!?!
　
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Kiddson walks down the ramp slowly and enters the ring. Kiddson looks around and takes a second then opens his Jacket and shows a Shirt that has the JBW logo and in front of it, it reads...."Destruction is the only cure"

Kiddson then walks out the ring and walks back up the ramp and then turns around looking back at the fans and then points at his back which reads "02/22/11-2012 R.I.P" And then leaves.
　
K-Jam: Uhh, yeah, uh, I geuss that was, Kiddson.. Not too sure what he meant by all of that, but I'm guessing he's upping his game or something like that... Obviously he's not talking about destroying JBW, because I'd personally have to slap him if that's the case. Either way, we're moving the fuck on.
　
SIX MAN TAG MATCH

Rome: OK, I'm back. Miss much?
　
K-Jam: Kiddson returned and did some silly thing with his t-shirt... Oh, and your gay lover Caesar won the SHOWDOWN! Heavyweigjht strap... Why are you all sweaty?
　
Rome: The girls brought a friend.
　
KJam: OK, well, it's time for our semi-main event, which is below our match, because it's our fucking PPV.
　
Rome: Bring 'em out!

Felix Guerrero


　
The Mexican newcomer walks out onto the stage with a cocky strut and the New York fans pop big. He walks tall as he makes his way down towards the ring in way that flies in the face of his relatively minor experience in big matches in JBW.

Rome: This guys an idiot. He got one fluke win over JMan and he thinks he's the fucking man around here.

K-Jam: Agreed. His name is also like something Chavo would call his cat.

SHOWDOWN! Tag Team Champions: Broc & Sully



The Tag Champs walk out to a chorus of boo's from the brutal MSG fans in attendance. This is probably due to the choice of football jersey they have chosen to wear tonight.

K-Jam: What a pair of wankers these two are. If there were ever two pussies that we would fuck up real bad in that ring then its these two.

Rome: And the understatements keep on rolling in. Heres another one... These guys are woefully out of their depth. Lets get the big boys out here.

[Kashdinero]

"The Alpha Dog" Gabriel Xander



Lance Storms most famous student runs out onto the stage to one of the loudest pops of the night.

He cups his hands to his mouth and shouts..
...
'WHATS MY MOTHER FUCKING NAME?!?'

To which the fans respond with..

"ALPHA DOG!!"

Alphs laughs and nods his head as he makes his way down towards the ring.

Rome: You know, I love how this fool doesn't even know his own name yet they still love him.

K-Jam: They like reminding him. It makes them feel special.

JBW World SuperFly Champion: Avidco



The worlds most popular Luchadore walks out onto the stage to a booming reaction from the New York faithful.

He is holding what appears to be a T-shirt launcher, but when he fires it into the crowd hundreds of Avidco masks come flying down. The lucky fans that catch them put them on immediately in a show of support for their favourite masked wrestler

Rome: This guy is a disgrace to all mask wearers everywhere.

K-Jam: You're just pissed off that the Avi' masks are outselling the Rome masks on the Jabe Shop Site THREE to one.

WARFare World Heavyweight Champion: JMan



Many wrestlers dream of competing at MSG, but JMan is the world champion, and it is clear that this is a proud moment for him.

The fans begin chanting his name as he makes his way down the ramp, and he make's sure to high five as many as he can.

Rome: Another thing I love is the fact that this guy can cheat his way to wins, and the fans still love him, yet you and I do the occasional naughty thing and they hate on us.

K-Jam: Did you know that me and JMan were born on the same day?

Rome: My answer is, why would I care?


　
　
　

　
After twenty plus minutes of back and forth action, all six men are almost spent.

JMan is laying on the outside after a deadly looking spike piledriver from Broc and Sully that looks like it could have done some serious damage.

The Alpha Dog has Felix in an STF and is showing no sign of releasing the hold anytime soon, when one half of the SHOWDOWN! Heavyweight Tag Team Champions Sully sprints into the ring and breaks it up--Sully spins around and is met with a springboard dropkick from the JBW SuperFly Champion. A second after impact, Broc storms the ring, and the other half of the SHOWDOWN! Heavyweight Tag Team Champions throws a militant looking yakuza kick in Avidco's direction. Avidco ducks his head, runs towards the ropes and springboards backwards using his momentum to help him snap Broc over with a lightning fast Avi-ranna. Broc rolls to the outside, and holds onto the back of his head, clearly more than a little disorientated.

Avidco spies Felix on the floor and grabs him by the back of his mask and forces him to his feet.

Felix suddenly snaps out of it and begins firing off shots to Avidco's face.

BAM BAM BAM!

He grabs him in a headlock but Avidco pushes him off. Felix hits the ropes at lightning speed and comes back at Avidco twice as fast. Avidco swings a clothesline--Felix ducks and hits the opposite ropes before rebounding and nailing a picture perfect flying forearm.

He goes for the cover...

"ONE!"

"TWO!"

The JBW SuperFly Champ kicks out, but stays down holding onto his jawbone.

A frustrated Felix Guerrero slaps the ring mat in frustration and gets to his feet.

He feels a light tap-tap on his shoulder--he spins around and...

BOOM!

He turns straight into "Great Match, Lets Go Eat!"

A fully recovered JMan makes the cover.

"ONE!"

Rome: Hahahaha!!

K-Jam: Man, if only he could have done that at the beginning of the match, then we wouldn't have had to sit and watch that pile of shit.

"TWO!!"

Rome: Well at least I got to scout the WARFare World Heavyweight Champion before I take his belt.

K-Jam: You're not actually serious about that are you? That must mean you're looking to take my belt as well.

Rome: THREEEEE!!! Great match! Lets, uh, go eat or something...

K-Jam: Way to ignore my last comment... Prick.

JMan, The Alpha Dog, and Avidco stand triumphant in the ring, with Alpha in the middle of the JMan and Avidco, who raise their WARFare World Heavyweight Championship and JBW SuperFly Championships respectively.

K-Jam: Oooo-Kaaaay... I think it's about time Romes and I went and won ourselves some gold.

Rome: After you, champ.

K-Jam: No, after you, future champ.

　
Rome: *mumbles*Damn right.
　
K-Jam: What was that?
　
Rome: Nothing.
　
K-Jam: *mumbles* Damn right.
　
Romes: What wa- ah, fuck it--lets do this.
.
*
　
The camera goes back to the carpark, where Dave is still waiting on V3.

Dave: Sorry people, V3 still haven't arrived yet, and to tell the truth, I'm a little worried. I know -as do you all- that they like to arrive in style, and they're usually late, but the main event is about to start... Guys, for the first time in history I'm a little worried for Venni Vidi Vici... Back to you I guess.


*

[Kashdinero]

Mayhem World Heavyweight Tag Team Championship match
　
V3 (c) vs K-Flare
　
Sly: Thats right, folks, its me, the broadcasting MVP, Sly Sylvesterstien, here to call this extremely special main event. The challengers look hungry for this. Just look at the future champions, K-Jammin and RomanFlare, in the ring awaiting V3, who, acording to Dave, haven't arrived yet.. Obviously, they're going to be along any minute no-
The JabeTron suddenly begins flashing images of all of the various modes of transport that Venni Vidi Vici have arrived in throughout their existence in JBW--the pro K-Flare fans in attendance begin booing loudly, but the voices of the thousands of V3 fans pop at every passing image; such as a jubilant looking PandaMassacre atop of an Indian elephant defecating on K-Jammin's main squeeze -Lucy- as she is sitting in her brand new convertible, and the image of St George, Psycho Siaki, and Ma$$Dinero manning a sherman tank.

The intervals between the images begin to speed up until they become a blur. They finally come to a halt and a smiling Dave can now be seen still standing in the car park, anxiously awaiting on his -extremely late arriving- V3 compatriots to see just what vehicle they will be pulling up in tonight.

Ten seconds or so pass and Dave's smile begins to falter, when...

Suddenly...

A voice can be heard off camera, and by the easily recognisable tone of the East London accent, everybody in attendance knows exactly who it belongs to--V3's very own Cockney rhyming, lovable rouge; St George!

St George: 'ello, china; any chance you can tell me why you're loitering in a carpark at such a late hour? Wait--don't tell me you're here waiting for V3?!?! Didn't you get the memo, my china?

George walks on screen to an astounding pop from the majority of the thousands in attendance; proving that even the most die hard of K-Flare fans have a soft spot for the original JBW defenders of all things unjust.

Dave: M-M-Memo?!?! No!! Man, why does nobody tell me anything around here!?!

George: We did, you floppy hampton! We e-mailed you last week with tonights plan of action.

Dave: George, I have an iPhone, and I check my e-mails on the hour every hour--you can't have sent it to me!

George: Of course we did! You don't think I'd be kicking up such a pen and ink about it if we never, do ya'?

Dave: Are you sure you sent it to the right address?

George: What are ya' trying to say, Davey boy? Are you implying that we're a bit 'fore an' aft'? Dave, this is 2012, and I'm pretty certain we know how to send a fookin' email to the right address... Its Dave<3PrincessPoccahontas@gmail.com, right?

Dave: What!?! George, I haven't seen Princess Pochahontas in MONTHS! And furthermore; that email address was a rib on me cooked up by Ma$$ to take the piss out of me!

George: Ahh, I see.. well, didn't you get the PM's we sent ya' on EWN?

Dave: No... Ever since they switched to their new beta site, I -along with a multitude of others- can't access that place from my phone, and being a part of JBW pretty much guarantees that I'm on the road basically 24/7, so I don't use my laptop that much... Why didn't you send it to my account on the new Jabe site?

George: Well, w-

George is cut off by an agitated and impatient K-Jammin.

K-Jammin: Oh enough with the bullshit, you two! And they say that me and Rome are a pair of fags!?! This is just painful! Lets just hurry this part of the show along so K-Flare can become the brand new Mayhem World Heavyweight Tag Team Cha-

George: Oi Oi, look who it is, Dave... None other than the pile of Tommy Tank that is, ahem, our Mayhem World Heavyweight Champion. How the fook are ya', Gay-Ramming!?!

K-Jammin and Roman stare at the JabeTron with an evil look in their eye.

I would ask you what you've been up to, but from the way you two are standing so close to one another, its obvious the only thing you've been up is each others Gary Glitters! Now before you interrupted me, I was about to steal a line from Punch & Judy and say... "They're behiiiinnnd you"

K-Jammin: Oh no they're not!

Ma$$ & Siaki: OH YES WE ARE!

Bo-Boom!

The Mayhem World Heavyweight Tag Team Champions -who had just sneaked up on the distracted K-Flare- nail the challengers with a pair of sick looking spears, and this one is underway.
　

　

　
Sly: K-Jammin grabs Ma$$ in a headlock--he's egging Rome on! What's Rome doing? The hell---THE COBRA! ROME HAS THE COBRA! HE SWINGS--HE HIT K-JAMMIN! Ma$$dinero ducked the attack!

Rome bends over K-Jammin, and starts slapping him in the face. He's out cold. He turns around and eats a high kick to the head!

Sly: Big kick from Ma$$! He's on for the pin--1, 2, THREE! V3 defeats K-Flare on their own show!
...
Ma$$and Siaki leave the ring, and grabs their belts. They take one last look at the ring, and laugh out loud, before jumping over the ring barriers and leaving the building through the crowd.

Rome and K-Jammin stumble to their feet. Rome extends a hand of friendship and Jammin gladly accepts. They climb onto the ropes and wave to the fans, Rome making a 'wanking it' gesture at a girl in the front row. They hop down and as Jam heads to the other side, Rome motions to the ringside assistant for Jam's title. He holds it up in the air as K-Jammin celebrates on the ropes. As K-Jammin jumps down and turns, Rome drills him in the head with the title.

Sly: What the hell? Rome just blindsided K-Jammin!

Rome kicks and pushes Jammin out of the ring, throwing the title down at him. His music starts to play as he leans out of the ring and demands a mic.

Rome: Cut my music, cut the fucking music!

He slides out of the ring, grabs a ringside chair, and slithers back into the ring. He sets it up all nice and pretty, facing the ramp, and sits crosslegged.

Rome: How's it feel, Jammin? How's it feel to be my bitch for a night? How's it feel to be skullfucked with your own title? Or, better yet, how's it feel to know it won't be your title for very long? While you've been running around sticking your dick in anything damp and warm, I've been sitting there, grinding my teeth, biding my time. But no longer you egomaniac fucker. You wanna know why? Because this is MY TIME. NOW IS THE RISE OF ROME!

You want some insider information? Fine--listen in good, audience, because I've got some good shit here. You wanna know what's coming up in a few weeks? Huh? The DRAFT! YEAH! JBW's first draft is almost here! Rednecks and Ninjas, Gay Tag Partners and the Virgin 3--anyone can change brands! Isn't it fun and exciting? Well, K-Jammin, it's not going to be very fucking fun for you. Come draft night, you'll be putting that shiny piece of gold on the line against ME!

Rome leans forward, smiling at K-Jammin as he sits on the stage. Rome's music starts to play again, causing him to leap up, kicking the chair across the ring.

Rome: TURN THAT SHIT OFF! I'm going to stick my foot up your ass, sound guy, if you DON'T TURN IT OFF! I'M NOT DONE! I've got EVEN BIGGER NEWS! Because, "Jamster", you won't be the only one I'm going to twist into a pretzel, oh no. That jackoff Jman from Warfare AND that pussy Caesar from Showdown! We're going to have ourselves one big ol' Fatal Fourway! FOR ALL THE MARBLES! Come the end of draft night, the Roman One will be wearing ALL THE GOLD in JBW

[Kashdinero]

Its time to fill.

[Kashdinero]

Mega thanks to everyone who pitched in.

Ultra thanks to my buddy and WARFare creative tag team partner, Zapph.

[Kashdinero]

I sure hope everybody gets to read the show in its entirety, as I am entirely satisfied with it.

Its certainly the show you've all been waiting for.

[Kashdinero]

And then some lol.

Some mighty fine match ups even if I do say so myself.

[Kashdinero]

The first half of the show is done in the normal half video half write up, but the last few matched are done with full write ups.


After you read this show, you'll know why I'm hyping it up so much.

You'll also understand how nervous I was to post it lol.

[Kashdinero]

Comp is acting like a stubborn mule, so don't expect the show to be fully posted for an hour or so.