Airdate: Monday, January 30th, 2012 (USA Network)
Location: The Sprint Center in Kansas City, Missouri
Results by Tony Acero of 411
“Yes, sir, we promised you a great main event…”
Cole calls the Rumble controversial as John Laurinaitis comes down, without music. We are reminded that Triple H is here as Johnny Ace slaps hands with the fans. They say he sucks, but he is all smiles. He shakes the hand of King and Cole as well as Justin Roberts and a few other peeps with names that none of us know. He makes his way to the middle of the ring,
He is smiling, as he looks forward to his review.Has he made mistakes? Yes he has. Name him one successful man who hasn't. A wise man once said that it's ok to make mistakes as long as you don't make it twice, and he has yet to do that!. So I am confident that I will be named the Permanent GM of RAW. After all, my review is being done by one of the greatest performers of all time; Triple H."
He wants to talk about the Rumble. He called it right down the middle as well as doing his duties as an Exec. He now wants to introduce the participants in the Elimination Chamber match:
CM Punk, Kofi Kingston, Dolph Ziggler, The Miz, R-Truth and Chris Jericho
Tonight is special, he says. Beth Phoenix will face Eve for the Divas Championship. Kofi and The Miz are going to tango, and Dolph Ziggler will go one on one with Randy Orton. Also, for the first time ever, the World Heavyweight Champion will take on the WWE Champion, CM Punk! He's also go----
CM Punk's music hits, interrupting Ace. Punk starts the ol Na Na Na Na, Good Bye chant, and the crowd helps out. He even gets King and Justin Roberts to join in on the jingle. He gets in the face of Ace to sing it to him, calling Ace clown shoes. Ace says that he owes him an apology for thinking that Ace was going to screw Punk out of the title. Punk says he doesn't owe him anything, and as far as him being a man of his words, he's not...he's a liar. He calls him poorly dressed, dork, and a ham sandwich. He came out to see his dimwitted face one more time before he was fired. Punk has enjoyed how Ace cannot speak clearly into a microphone, how he stammers of simple words, and how he has figured out a way to both suck and blow at the same time. He isn't Triple H's biggest supporter in the world, but he can't wait for Trips to kick Ace out the front door.
Ace says he won't take what he says personally, this is about business. Now Punk and the board both know that he's honest, fair and creative. He has taken RAW and Punk's reign to new heights. On a personal note, he'd like to drop the beef. Ace extends out his hand. Punk says the only way he'd shake hands is if he were hitting the G2S. Here comes the Valkyries!!!
Daniel Bryan's music hits and the World Heavyweight Champion is here. He introduces himself, in case we didn't know who he was. He asks if Punk and Ace remember him. He says no one cares about their personal problems. While they were busy conducting their soap opera, he was busy winning. He knows Ace is trying to save his job by giving them the main event, and no disrespect to Punk, compared to what he went through last night, Punk isn't exactly much of a challenge. Punk says, yeah, he's right, all he is is The Best Wrestler in the world. Bryan says that's great and fantastic, but he is more than just a wrestler...he is a role model. I'm a Vegan! I don't even eat meat!! Punk is aware of it, but that begs the question, exactly what do you eat? He's curious. Bryan says if he is going to take his pipe bomb and stick it where the sun don't shine.
Punk says they've known each other for just over a decade, how bout tonight they just give Kansas City a show? Bryan is the World Heavyweight Champ, he's the WWE champ. Let's give Kansas City the best wrestling match in the world.
Ah, here comes the 2012 Royal Rumble winner, Sheamus!! He hates to come in and break up the love fest, but he wanted to remind everyone that he is the winner of the Rumble, fella! He also wants to remind the champs that they will both be defending their championships, and he also wants to remind Johnny Ace that he could be fired. Ace is still all smiles. He wants to remind everyone that he has earned the right to be in the Main Event of Wrestlemania, and we get the cascading sign for the 10th time in as many days. With a bit of luck of the Irish, he'll be the next WWE or World Heavyweight Champ. So, good luck to both champs, and as for Johnny, he wants to share an Irish saying with him. "May Triple H kick ya n the arse so hard, you'll be throwin up your lace covered undies."
We are back to RAW, and Josh Mathews is in a Sky Box with Wade Barrett who is said to have a vested interest in this next matchup. We are informed of a 1-on-1 match between Orton and Barrett on Smackdown. Mathews asks Barrett what is going through his mind. He says that this Friday he's going to do worse than tossing Orton down the steps.
Match 1: Randy Orton vs. Dolph Ziggler (w/ Vickie Guerrero)
Lockup to start! Of course. Dolph gets Orton in the corner then hits a knee, a right, and a whip to the ropes. Orton reverses, leap frog from orton, leap frog from Dolph. Dolph holds the ropes, struts then wipes his hair. Orton is not impressed. Lockup, Orton with a side headlock take down. Dolph tries fighting out of itt, but Orton stands. Dolph sends Orton to the ropes, and Dolph comes back with a shoulder block. Orton up top with the fists of fury, he gets to 10 then whips Dolph, but Dolph reverses only for Orton to hit a clothesline. Uppercut from Orton. They intersplice Dolph in a little side box as he talks about the Rumble. Dolph hits a dropkick out of the corner as we go to break.
We are back with Dolph atop Orton from behind. He's got himself a cravat until Orton backs up into the Corner, smashing Dolph in the process. Orton sends Dolph to the corner, and Dolph... (Continues on next page)