WWE Raw Results (3/5) - Rock, HBK Returns!

mic and says he's wrong, playa, and calls out security. Ace is demanded to leave! Security takes both Otunga and Ace out of the building while Ace screams that he'll get them. Teddy then gives the mic back to Justin Roberts to officially announcer the winner. Santino is crying. Wonderful! hahaha. He does the trombone, and Teddy, Kofi and Aksana join him.

We are informed that up next, we get "Rock's History Lesson #1." Well this should be interesting...

We're back, and The Rock is on cam at the Boston Harbor. He says Finally, then looks at the screen. He says that tonight he is going to give Cena a history lesson. Lesson #1, in 1773, the great people of Boston had had enough of the British. The people started...a Revolution. The American Revolution. Tonight, they start the Rock Revolution. In 1773, the people took England's Tea and tossed it in the Harbor. The Rock says tonight, there's going to be a party of there own. WE zoom out to see a merchandise table of random merch. Rock tosses a shirt over the barricade and tosses it over the harbor. The John Cena garden gnome, midget shorts and various other shit. Next, the John Cena wristbrands and, his favorite, John Cena cologne...they actually make this. hahaa. He takes a whiff and says it smells like fear, Fruity Pebbles and possum piss. The Rock says that the Revolution begins tonight. He can take the garbage that has been shoved down the throats of people's throats for years. You can take all of this, roll it all up in a ball and shove it straight up his candy ass! The Rock says that they're going all across Boston until he ends up in the middle of the ring. He tells a Jabroni to get in a row boat and clean up the Harbor. The people's party starts tonight...Boston, here we go.

Match 2: Alicia Fox vs. Eve
Alicia is looking more Jazz and less Rihanna tonight...Kelly Kelly is on commentary. We start with a go behind from Alicia, but Even gets in a side headlock then some rope work ends with Alicia hitting a jawbreaker. Eve trips up Alicia, though, then pins for the 1...2...3!!!
Winner: Eve (No Rating)
Pointless

The music of Zack Ryder hits and out comes the man himself with a cane! I hope it's a pimp cane. Ryder says he's glad that he and Eve never hooked up because you know what they say, Broskis before Hoskis! He gets a woo woo woo and a You Know it!

In the back, Ryder is walking. Eve meets up with him and she says she has something to tell him. She stutters a bit then makes out with his ass. She walks away with an evil grin, leaving Ryder smiling like a 14 year old after his first time.

Earlier today, John Cena had himself a little moment in an empty arena. He claims that WM 28 is full of moments. End of an Era, legends remembered, and champions crowned, but through all that, all eyes will be focused on one match. But it's not a match, it's a once in a lifetime opportunity. There is no denying the fact that The Rock is the most successful superstar in the WWE. He is a superstar in and out of the wrestling business. He vowed not to come back till he found a worthy opponent and found one in him. he doesn't intend to go to Mania and be just happy to be there. he wants to win, he needs to win. He grew up around here, and recently Boston is known as the city of Champions. For so many years, it was known as the City of Heartbreak. He remembers when the New England Patriots won 18 games in a row to lose to the Giants. Every NE resident shares his sentiment. It holds true then that no one remembers 2nd place. He's done some wonderful things here in the WWE and he's proud, but Mania 28 is everything. If he doesn't win, he becomes another name in The Rock's notebook. But if he wins, if he could go to Mania with his hand raised at the end, then he wins the big one. This is a match, an event that will make history. It is what it is supposed to be; the most successful event in the WWE. It will break records. No one will remember second place. That's why he needs to win. That's why Mania is so important. Because Mania 28 is sink or swim, all or nothing, his legacy.

Match 3: CM Punk and Sheamus vs. Daniel Bryan and Chris Jericho
Punk and Jericho to start. They circle the ring a bit then lock up! Jericho with a side headlock takedown. Headscissors to escape. They do it again. A third time, and Jericho pushes Punk. Punk answers back with a few kicks, then some roope work ends with Punk monkey flipping Jericho and hitting some arm drags. Punk sends Jericho to the ropes, but Jericho holds on and rolls toward Bryan and tags. That was a nice ass exchange. Bryan calls for a test of strength but only momentarily as he kicks Punk. Punk sends Bryan to the corner then tags in Sheamus. Sheamus with some forearms to the back then sends Bryan over the ropes, but Bryan golds on and hits a shoulder block to Sheamus. Sheamus gets him caught up in the ropes though and beats on his chest with eyes bigger than Beaker. He pins for 1...2...NO! Oh Lord, they put the camera on AJ and I lose concentration.

Punk is tagged in and gets an inverted atomic drop then a kick to the chest. Punk hits the ropes, but there's Jericho to kick the back of Punk. Bryan tags in Jericho as we go to our first break.

We're back and Jericho has Punk in a chinlock. Punk stands out of it and turns. Some rights to the gut of Jericho is enough to break the hold. Punk hits the rope, but Jericho hits a sidewalk slam and a pin for 1...2..NO! Jericho with a blow to the shoulder then a kick to the back of Punk. Jericho with a kick to the front of Punk. He hits the ropes and Punk stands quickly to hit a leg lariat. He goes for a pin and gets it! Here comes Sheamus with some double axe handles and a big body slam. Bryan is in the ring so Sheamus shoulder blocks him. Jericho stands and runs right into the Irish Curse. Pin for 1...2..NO! Sheamus is on the apron. He's looking to go up top, but Bryan pulls at his leg. Jericho with a springboard dropkick to Sheamus. Sheamus is on... (Continues on next page)