Airdate: Monday, July 23rd, 2012 (USA Network)
Location: The Scottrade Center in St. Louis, Missouri
Results by Tony Acero
“Yes, sir, we promised you a great main event…”
-New short video opening with the words, "Now, Then, Forever."
-A history of WWE Monday Raw video package airs. It was a pretty awesome video package to be honest with you, which should be no surprise because the WWE's production crew excels at video packages like this.
-Cole and Lawler welcome us to the show.
-Mr. McMahon is announced to kick off the show. Apparently he was not down for DX and their shenanigans. Vince strides to the ring with his classic power walk, and he looks like a happy man tonight. Vince says tonight makes 1,000 episodes of Raw, and he thanks the fans. We then get a "Thank you Vince" chant. Vince even drops the "Welcome to Monday Night Raw" line, and now he welcomes DX!
"Are you ready?" Triple H and Shawn Michaels are out in their camouflage pants and DX shirts. The crowd is very happy to see DX, and the shirts are special "One Night Only 1,000" DX themed shirts. CHA CHING. Shawn says he is feeling this, but he feels as if something is missing. He has his pants and underwear, but, he feels like something is missing. Triple H agrees, and says they have the gratuitous merchandise on. Triple H does a check and he for sure has underwear on. He then says there used to be more of them. Triple H asks the crowd the question and they pop, they point and here comes…THE ARMY JEEP with Road Dogg, Bad Ass Billy Gunn and X Pac. They all do the DX crotch chops with the pyro. Road Dogg on the mic, and says they are about to go on a boat ride down memory lane. Dogg does his mic work, which is always fun. He even censored himself saying, "The Bad "BLEEP" Billy Gunn." Triple H says this is a big start, and then does the "are you ready" shtick. He even makes fun that he is the only one left with a full head of hair, which cracks them all up. Gunn has the mic, and says this is his part, and cuts off Shawn. He says he did this very well, and Shawn says he started it all, and they converse about who should do this. Triple H jokes about Shawn losing his smile and posing for Playgirl. Triple H suggests they do the line together.
It is then that Damien Sandow interrupts the party. He is our intellectual savior, and Shawn says he wants to hear what he has to say, because to be honest, they are pretty scuzzy. Sandow discusses degenerates as he enters the ring. We should not accept this crass conduct. HBK says he is going home and going to church to ask forgiveness again. Sandow knows he can get beat down out there, but then says if they do that, he will not be a victim, he will be a martyr. Triple H says he makes a good point, and he says they will talk things over. Sandow says that they are very rude. They break their huddle, and we get a superkick, pedigree combo on Sandow. Gunn then drops the, "if you're not down with that" line to end the segment.
-The Rock returns tonight.
-Brock Lesnar will answer Triple H's challenge.
-Daniel Bryan and AJ get married tonight.
-Plus John Cena challenges CM Punk for the WWE Title tonight.
-Jim Ross now makes his way out to join the commentary team. BOOMER SOONER!
Six Man Tag: Rey Mysterio, Sin Cara and Sheamus vs. Chris Jericho, Dolph Ziggler and Alberto Del Rio
J.I.P. with Ziggler working over Sin Cara. Elbow drop connects for 2 by Ziggler. Tag to Jericho and he lays in rights to the ribs of Cara. Snap mare into a headlock, Jericho in control. Cara fights out, roll up gets 2 for Cara. Basement dropkick by Jericho, and he stops the tag. Slam by Jericho, one-foot cover for 1. Tag to Del Rio, whips Cara to the corner and lands a kick to the shoulder of Cara and covers for 2. Knees to the back by Del Rio, and then works a chinlock. Cara tries to escape, does and gets a boot to Del Rio. Tornado DDT connects and both men are down. Tags to Jericho and Sheamus. Sheamus cleans house on Jericho, slam countered and Sheamus with the back breaker gets 2. it breaks down now, Rey flies to the floor onto Del Rio. Cara kicks Ziggler to the floor. Jericho dumps him, and then tries for the walls on Sheamus. Countered and Sheamus stops a codebreaker. He then misses the boot, and Ziggler nails Jericho with a cheap shot. Sheamus sets, brogue kick to Jericho and that is all.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Rey Mysterio, Sin Cara and Sheamus @ 5:00 via pin
-The Rock will discuss the WWE Tile later tonight.
-Cole and Lawler discuss social media and TOUTS. They show some videos.
-Is JR really only commentating that tag match?
-Charlie Sheen is with them live via Skype. Sheen says the show is epic thus far, and he says he may fit in with DX. He thinks Sheamus may like to party, which is cool and that WWE may be a good home for him. He'll be back later in the night.
-We get a video package highlighting the relationship between Daniel Bryan and AJ.
-We then see AJ preparing backstage talking with Layla, who wasn't actually listening. She then asks if AJ wants to do this, and AJ is concerned that people call her mentally unstable. She says the whole place in unstable, and we see Truth and Piper doing jump rope with little Jimmy. Layla says it's just little Jimmy. They then see Mae Young with a DUDE IN A HAND COSTUME who says he is her son all grown up. Holy shit. Layla wishes AJ good luck and leaves.
-Jerry Lawler gets SONIC delivered to him at ringside. Product placement.
-Brodus Clay has the crowd clap for his brother from another mother, Dude Love.
Jack Swagger vs. Brodus Clay
Swagger tries to attack, but eats asuplex right away. Big splash by Clay and that is all. Yup.
OFFICIAL RESULT: Brodus Clay @ 0:10 via
-Mr. Socko to Swagger after the match, and then dancing.
-Triple H and Trish Stratus discuss yoga backstage, and Trish tries to teach him to be more flexible. DX... (Continues on next page)