CM PunkPhillip Jack Brooks
- Birthdate: 10/26/1978 (age 36)
- Height: 6'2"
- Weight: 218 Ib
He was titled in the WWE as "the longest-reigni...
Airdate: Monday, January 28th, 2013 (USA Network)
Location: The Thomas and Mack Center in Las Vegas, Nevada.
Results by Ken Hill
“Yes, sir, we promised you a great main event…”
It's VEGAS, BABY! Who's feeling lucky tonight? Vickie introduces us, and shows us three wheels, one of stipulations, one of superstars, and one for the "Vickie Vegas Challenge." She mentions US Champ Antonio Cesaro taking on Randy Orton, and a spin of the stip wheel shows there will be a special referee involved.
Punk's music hits and he is PISSED as he storms to the ring. He grabs a mic, incensed at how this should be his 435th day as champion, but he was CHEATED out of his championship by The Rock and Vince McMahon, who screwed him worse than Bret in Montreal, and it should be called the "Phoenix Screwjob." He never had anyone restart matches for him, he was a REAL champion, the true People's Champion.
Vince out to the ring and Punk is all over him for being a "flesh-peddling promoter." Vince has no problem crashing Punk's party like he did last night. He supposedly has video footage of Heyman in collusion with The Shield, and Heyman looks shell-shocked as Vince also states he will undergo a "performance evaluation" that could end with his termination if the footage has anything to do with it. He leaves Punk and Heyman, who are in absolute turmoil still.
Orton and Cesaro both make their way out to the ring, and the special referee is...DA MIZ! Cesaro's looking pretty peeved as Miz looks like the proverbial cat who caught the canary as we go to break...
Orton with a back body drop, which gets a two count from Miz. Cesaro backs Orton to the corner and jaw jacks with Miz. Orton counters a charge with a clotheslines, then a back suplex for two. Cesaro goes to the ropes, but Orton slithers out of the ring. Cesaro counters with a right, but Orton blocks him and suplexes him into the barricade. Orton puts Cesaro on the ring apron and gives some uppercuts 'Merican style, then a catapult into the ropes. The two start exchanging uppercuts, Cesaro gains the upper hand, but Orton baits him and sends him over the ropes. He goes out and drops Cesaro with a clothes line going into commercial...
Cesaro with a back suplex to Orton. Orton to the ropes, and counters a right, but Cesaro hangs him up on the turnbuckle joint, which gets a two count. Cesaro with a neck vice, Orton fights out with rights hands, but Cesaro counters with a nice Magnum Driver for a near fall. Cesaro shows off with a nice stalling gutwrench suplex for another near fall by the unbiased Miz. Cesaro locks in a sleeper, but Orton fights out, and delivers some clotheslines and a snap powerslam. Orton shoves Cesaro to the corner, but ANtonio with the knee and the Very European Uppercut for a near fall. He argues with Miz, which allows Orton to hit him with a backbreaker. Orton sets for the RKO, but Cesaro with a thumb to the eye. He lays into Randy with blows to the stomach, but Miz pulls himoff. Cesaro backs him up, Miz lays off, but this leaves Cesaro for the RKO (OUT OF NOWHERE!) for the three count.
Winner: Randy Orton
Miz "helps up" Cesaro following the match, before...yep...dropping him with the Skull-Crushing Finale, and does Cesaro's taunt to top it off.
The "Vickie Vegas Challenge" wheel is SPINNING in the back, and lands on "Make Me Laugh. We pan over to...Ryback? Vickie chuckles and dares him to make her laugh, and he just glares and snorts at her before heading to the ring. Who will Ryback have to make laugh, and how in God's name will he do it?
Ryback, Matt Striker, and the Primetime Players in the ring. Striker says, whoever makes the audience laughs most wins. Titus makes a joke about Striker, which gets a lukewarm response. Ryback asks who's got 2 eyes, twenty fingers, and is about to be unconscious? Darren wisely bails as Titus fights off Ryback, but gets the spinebuster, Meathook, and the Shell-Shock, all while Darren Young looks on. Striker gets a good chuckle out of it, but interrupts Ryback's MO with the audience to congratulate him stupidly enough, and gets a Shell-Shock, much to JBL and Cole's amusement.