Event: WWE Monday Night RAW
Airdate: Monday, April 22nd, 2013 (USA Network)
Location: The O2 Arena in London, England
Results by Ken Hill
“Yes, sir, we promised you a great main event…”
We preview both the epic 6-man tag match and the confrontation between Ryback and John Cena.
We are LIVE (sorta) from London, England with Paul Heyman in the ring. He talks about how Lesnar made headlines with his dismantling of the 3MB and even more so with his “extreme” challenge to HHH, which gets some “ECW” chants from the London crowd. We see the events from last Monday with Lesnar destroying 3MB and Heyman issuing the challenge for a “down-and-dirty, old school steel cage match.”
Paul gets the crowd’s hopes up with HHH’s answer, but says he’s not here and “claims” he has an e-mail from HHH, which states that he’ll give his answer next week because of his injuries. He calls HHH a coward for not being here, unlike Heyman…
TIME TO PLAY THE GAME!!! Whoops, Heyman done fucked up. Triple H makes his way to the ring as he always done, while Heyman’s expression ranks between bemused and scared shitless. He admits Triple H got him, he played the game and lost. Triple H points out further down in the e-mail: He lied. I’m SHOCKED. Even more SHOCKING? Pedigree to Heyman! Koo koo ka choo!
A renewal of a heated rivalry! Chris Jericho versus Dolph Ziggler TONIGHT!
R-Truth out, back to his usual pre-match “What’s Up” rap. Cesaro comes out with his yodeling. I can’t tell if he’s just bad or intentionally so so that he’ll get fired…
Antonio Cesaro vs. R-Truth
Antonio starts out strong, overpowering Truth with knees to the gut and a clothesline, followed by a mushroom stomp to the chest while the England crowd goes into their “Ole” chants. Truth counters a knee with a roll-up for a two count, then fires up with some clotheslines. He blocks a kick and hits a sit-out gourdbuster for a near fall. Cesaro counters Truth, but gets hit with the “What’s Up?” coming off the ropes for the sudden three count!
The Shield make a rather impressive entrance into England by chopper, before entering a black Humvee to take them to the arena.
Tons of Funk and the Funkadactyls come out to shake it as Brodus goes one-on-one with Damien Sandow NEXT!
Damien Sandow w/Cody Rhodes vs. Brodus Clay w/Sweet T & Funkadactyls
Brodus dominates Sandow for the beginning of the match, including headbutts to the back, amid chants of “Cody’s Mustache.” Sandow trips up Brodus and goes to work with knees to Clay’s head. He hits the Cubito Aequet to a mild pop for a near fall. Brodus fights out of a rear chin lock, fires up with more headbutts and the SHEE-plex. Cody distracts on the ring apron, allowing Sandow to hang up Brodus on the top rope and roll him up for the three.
Winner: Damien Sandow
Dolph Ziggler backstage, thinking he may be in love…with the World Championship. AJ stops by to talk to her “Zigglypuff” *snicker*. Dolph thinks she should have a belt of her own and she agrees that it doesn’t belong to her former BFF Kaitlyn. They start to make out and shoo off Langston, who be creepin’. As he stalks off, “Team Brickie” interrupt and gladly inform Ziggler that if he loses to Jericho, Y2J will be inserted into the World Title match at Extreme Rules. Ziggles don’t look too happy bout that.
Cole and company review Punk’s unusual behavior from last week, walking out in the middle of his promo concerning his WWE Title reign and fights with the Rock and Undertaker. Calls to Punk, according to Cole, have gone unanswered.
The Shield have arrived, and go into length about how the Undertaker, for years, has served as judge, jury and executioner in the WWE for years. However, for the first time in his career, Undertaker will know what real justice tastes like. Believe in the Shield.
Jericho makes his rock star entrance, lite-bright jacket and all, as his chance to enter the World Title match at Extreme Rules is NEXT!
Non-Title Match: World Champion Dolph Ziggler w/AJ & Big E. Langston vs. Chris Jericho
The two men lock up. Dolph rolls up Jericho for 2. Jericho with a headlock takeover for 2. Dolph and Jericho fight with the overhand wristlock. Jericho bridges out. Ziggler tries to roll Jericho up, but he rolls through and hits a dropkick. Jericho hits a shoulder block, Ziggler ducks, floats over, and then ducks through to the floor for a kiss from AJ and preens to the crowd. Jericho don’t like, so he baseball slides Ziggler into the barricade as we go to commercial.
Langston with a hard shot to Jericho behind the ref’s back. Ziggler hits a neckbreaker for two. He chokes Jericho with a knee, then an elbow gets 2. Jericho comes back with a chop, but misses the charge and hits the ring post on his way to the outside floor. Ziggler throws him back in and hits a boot. He dances around, but Jericho counters with a backslide for 2. Ziggler with a rear chin lock. Jericho fights out, but Ziggler transitions right into the sleeper hold. Jericho counters out with the back suplex. Dolph misses off the turnbuckle, Jericho with a shoulder block, gets tossed to the apron, but heads up top and hits an axe handle. Dolph dodges the bulldog, but Jericho with the forearm. He goes for the Walls, but Dolph fights out. Jericho gets the enziguri, but AJ distracts and Big E. with a hard right to Jericho, which gets a near fall for Dolph. Ziggler feigns a clothesline and rolls Jericho up for another near fall. Dolph with the sleeper hold, but Jericho counters with a piggyback jawbreaker. Jericho misses a clothesline and Dolph hits a big DDT for a close near fall! Ziggler gets an elbow by Jericho, Lionsault gets knees by Ziggler, Fame-asser connects, one…two..thr-NO! VERY close. Walls countered, Ziggler goes up top, Jericho counters, SUPERPLEX! 1…2..THR-NO! Big E. on the apron, but Jericho dropkicks him off. Dolph dropkick…Jericho counters into the Walls! Fandango’s music hits! The crowd goes Fandango-ing! Jericho awaits Fandango, but Dolph kicks him in the knee and hits the Zig Zag! Three count! The Triple Threat remains!
Winner: Dolph Ziggler
We highlight Ryback’s “revenge” on John Cena, leaving him to a beatdown at the hands of the Shield, and we find out that Ryback will have chance for the WWE Title at Extreme Rules.
Josh Matthews in the back with Mick Foley. Matthews congratulates Mick on his book chronicling his life and career in wrestling and asks about WWE now and the Attitude Era. Mick says man’s mindset has not changed during the changing times; one does not look in the mirror and blame themselves for their shortcomings, and Ryback shouldn’t either, as he faces his greatest challenge in four weeks against John Cena.
Cody Rhodes vs. “Sweet T” Tensai
Cody with some quick jabs, but Tensai cuts him off quickly. He then holds Cody up for the longest stalling butterfly suplex I’ve ever seen. Cody cuts off Tensai’s offense with a Disaster Kick andstomps him down. He misses a shoulder in the corner. Tensai fires up with a GORILLA flip out of the corner, then hits the big corner rolling senton. Sandow tries to distract, but Brodus takes him down. Cody’s next Disaster Kick is blocked, and Tensai hits the choke bomb and back senton for the three count.
Winner: “Sweet T” Tensai
Bryan and Kane argue over strategy for their 6-man tag with Taker against the Shield. Bryan’s concerned with whether Taker will be there or not for their team discussion and Kane practically begs Bryan not to show his brother diagrams or ask for a hug. Bryan promises. Team Hell No is then assaulted and we see two pairs of black boots, presumably belonging to the Shield, walk into the camera.
Cole recaps Team Hell No getting beaten down and questions the possibility of Undertaker in a 3-on-1 handicap match against The Shield.
Smackdown’s main event last Friday is recapped, with Big Show and Mark Henry reigning supreme over Sheamus and Randy Orton.
Ryback in the back with Josh Matthews. He agrees with Foley’s earlier comments, and says he only sees the future WWE Champion in the mirror. However, he feels Foley and him should discuss this further, face-to-face. Ryback rules.
Big E. makes his way to the ring for action NEXT!
Big E. Langston vs. Zack Ryder
Langston just flips Ryder big time and Zack gets tossed about. Ryder with a kick, but Big E. isn’t fazed in the least. Ryder caught, and Big E. hits repeated rib breakers, dropping Ryder to the mat. Zack dodges a charge, and tries for the Broski Boot, but Langston just flattens him with a clothesline and polishes him off with the Big Ending for the three.
Winner: Big E. Langston
Undertaker’s first match on Raw in three years is coming up as the epic 6-man tag team match is NEXT!
The Undertaker makes his legendary entrance as the crowd is in awe and chants for the Phenom as he enters the ring. The Shield are out next, and it seems as if their assault on Team Hell No will pay off. They surround the Undertaker, who stands his ground…BOOM! Here comes his baby brother and B. Dazzle! They even up the odds and clear the Shield out of the ring! The brothers and Bryan stand tall as we will have our 6-man tag match…NEXT!
Six-Man Tag: The Undertaker & Team Hell No vs. The Shield
Ambrose and Bryan to start. Raucous “YES!” chants. Bryan with kicks to Ambrose, followed by a knee to the gut. Cover gets a 2 count. Bryan tags in Kane, who hits a basement dropkick for 2. Uppercut to Ambrose. Kane wrenches his arm, and tags in Big Brother. Taker with big ol’ soupbones to Ambrose, clothesline, then a flying lariat for 2. Ambrose comes back with rapid rights, but Taker gets a boot up and hits Old School to a nice pop and a 2 count. He tags out to Kane. “You still got it” chants for the Dead Man. Reigns tags in, but he gets dropped with an uppercut. Bryan tags in, and Team Hell No with a nice Irish whip-dropkick combo for a near fall. Kane tags back in and hits a running elbow drop for a 2 count. Kane works over Reigns, who gets an elbow up and hits a flying forearm for 2. Kane’s backed into the Shield’s corner, and they take Kane down with a nice triple team, ending with a Rollins jumping kick for two. Ambrose back in and wears Kane down with rights. Kane tries to fight out, but Ambrose takes him back down. Reigns in, and hits shoulders into Kane’s gut. Reigns with a rear chinlock. Kane fights out with a back suplex. Rollins gets the tag first, but Kane drops him with a hard uppercut. Bryan gets the tag, hits Rollins with some blistering kicks, then floats up and over and hits a running lariat for 2. Buzzsaw kick gets a near fall. Rollins sent up and over to the floor. Incoming goat! Rollins drilled into the barricade. Bryan up top, hits a big missile dropkick to Rollins, but misses the follow-up kick and falls hard to the mat as we go to commercial.
Bryan fights out of a Reigns hold, but gets shoved down with a big palm thrust. Rollins tags in with some rapid stomps to Bryan. Daniel whipped hard into the corner. Rollins taunts him and whips Bryan into the other corner. Rollins mouths off to Taker, which really incites the Dead Man. Ambrose tags in with rights to Bryan, and a big clothesline. He drops a wild-looking forearm into Bryan for 2. He perches Bryan on his knees, makes the tag to Rollins, who hits a nasty-looking knee drop for a near fall on Bryan. Reigns tags in, but misses a charge. TAG EN FUEGO TO THE DEAD MAN! He clears Reigns from the ring, knocks down Rollins and biels Ambrose into the ring! He dominates Ambrose, hitting the clotheslines, the big boot, and the legdrop for a near fall. VINTAGE flying lariat gets a near fall for Taker. Rollins tries to break things up, but he and Ambrose get goozled by Taker. SPEAR BY REIGNS! One…two…thr-TAKER KICKS OUT! Reigns is stunned! Taker makes the tag to Kane, who takes Rollins down with a boot and the vaunted flying clothesline. he sets up for the chokeslam, Rollins floats out, hits a nice spin kick, and makes the tag to Ambrose. Kane, however, goozles him and hits the chokeslam! Tag to Bryan, who goes for the “Flying Goat” headbutt, but Reigns trips him up on the top rope. Taker and Kane dispose of Rollins and Reigns. Ambrose tries to superplex Bryan, but he gets knocked off. Flying headbutt misses, and Ambrose rolls up Bryan for the three!
Winners: The Shield
Kane and Undertaker are completely stunned at the loss as The Shield celebrate.
Mick Foley has accepted Ryback’s “invitation” to meet him in the ring later tonight.
Mick Foley talks with John Cena (“BOOOO!”) about his decision to “talk” with Ryback. John Cena says he may be confusing bravery with intelligence facing Ryback in the ring. Mick says in a mistake-filled career, this may be his biggest (No, that would be the “era” of Corporate Dude Love), but it’s less about honor and more about being who he is. Cena reluctantly agrees and makes Mick promise to bring a chair to the ring.
Now, it’s time to…FANNN…DANNNN…GOOOOOO! He’s in action NEXT!
Fandango vs. William Regal
Regal’s no slouch on the dance floor as he does a nice step or two to a big pop from the home crowd. He unloads on Fandango with some stiff southpaw shots. He hammers forearms into Fandango. The ref backs him off, and Fandango hits Regal with a leaping kick from the apron. Back in the ring, Fandango hits his modified reverse STO for the quick three count.
Fandango reminds us how to pronounce his name, and dances with his lady friend up the ramp. At the entrance, they dance some more until Jericho come out and knock Fandango off the entrance to the floor. He beckons the lady dancer, and they do a nice little routine to Fandango’s dismay.
Diva’s Title #1 Contender Battle Royal is NEXT!
#1 Contender Battle Royal for Divas Championship: Layla vs. Tamina Snuka vs. Naomi vs. Aksana vs. AJ Lee
Divas Champ Kaitlyn on commentary, sounding absolutely bored with what’s going on in the ring. Who can blame her, really? Bellas are apparently disqualified from the battle royal due to their “Twin Magic” from last week. AJ gets caught by Tamina and tries to “play nice” to a pop from the males in the crowd, but gets dropped HARD with a thrust kick and she looks knocked the fuck out. Aksana is first eliminated. Tamina eliminates Naomi by throwing her through the ropes, but Layla kicks Tamina through the ropes as well. She tries to pick up AJ. Cole lampshades the flaw in logic by wondering why Layla doesn’t just push her under the ropes. AJ suddenly pops up and kicks Layla to the floor and wins the #1 contendership, blowing a kiss to her former BFF Kaitlyn.
Winner: AJ Lee
We get a preview of “No One Lives” (Creative title) featuring Brodus Clay.
Mick Foley is WALKING, chair in hand, as he confronts Ryback NEXT!
Mick Foley makes his way out to a nice ovation from the London crowd. He’s not here for a fight, but merely to find out what he needs to know from Ryback. The man in question makes his way down. Ryback wonders why Foley thinks he needs a chair. Foley said, initially, he was insulted when Cena gave him the chair. He’s Mick Foley. Whether it’s been a tooth in his nose, or having his ear ripped off his skull, Foley’s never backed down from a fight. He’s never made excuses and listed reasons why he’s fallen short of his goals. 3 times he was good enough to be champion, and for Ryback, it’s inevitable given his physical dominance that he’ll be WWE Champion. Ryback just ignores this. He says he gets what he wants and when he wanted a shot at the WWE Title, he got it. Ryback calls Foley out on coming out the last few years to get involved in other peoples’ business. He says he will defeat “Super Cena” at Extreme Rules and take what is his. He calls Foley a “fat, pathetic bastard” and tosses the chair out of his hands, which prompts Cena (“BOOOO!”) to hit the ring and usher Foley out.
Suddenly, The Shield’s music hits, and the two men look around for the trio. Cena makes his way to the apron and, like Ryback last week, leaves the ring as The Shield hit the ring and assault Ryback. Cena has a change of heart, however, comes back and clears the Shield from the ring with steel chair in hand. Back in the ring with Ryback, Cena and he have a stare-off. Ryback glances at the chair Cena throws down right before Cena picks him up for the AA. Cena stands tall (*sigh* again) as we fade to black.
Credit: Ken Hill