Prior to this past weekend’s Royal Rumble pay-per-view (PPV), WWE Champion Daniel Bryan spoke to Arizona’s 12 News to promote the event. During the interview, Bryan got into an exchange with Arizona Diamondbacks infielder, Cody Decker. The pair talked about each other’s beards, before Bryan went off on the concept of “manscaping.”
Bryan: “You’re not so big. Yeah, I was talking about punching people in the face. I don’t think you’ve got what it takes, little man.”
Decker: “I’m sorry, your beard is nice, your beard is pleasant, but have you seen this thing? This thing’s got a point, yours is just kinda all spl-.”
Bryan: “Okay, okay, okay. This is the problem with the world – you see this? He calls this a beard. Like a real man would just, like, manicure his beard. Do you see the lines here? Do you see the effort he’s put in to this? No real man would put that kind of effort in to a beard. That’s called manscaping! Manscaping is a horrible thing in this world! This! This is uncluttered man right here! This is unfiltered manliness.”
Decker: “I hired a barber! I don’t do this on my own – that’s ridiculous.”
Bryan: “Yeah, that’s what I’m saying, hiring somebody to trim your beard, what kind of bourgeois baseball player are you? Hiring some man to just trim your beard. That’s outrageous! Listen, part of my platform is to fight against stupidity. That’s what I’m doing, I’m fighting the world of stupidity. There’s all these people doing and saying all these stupid things and I’m trying to fight them all. I can’t fight them all on my own! I can’t fight ’em all on my own! Stupid beards, stupid things about beads, I can’t fight them all on my own! But I’m gonna try because I’m the WWE Champion, I’m Daniel Bryan!”
H/T Wrestling Inc. for the transcriptions
