It certainly has been a long time, has it not? Wait, what’s that you say? There’s a PPV this Sunday? Seeing as how we are in January, the only assumption I can make is that the PPV is New Year’s Revolution. Wait, I forgot. This isn’t the Ruthless Aggression Era. So we must be at the Royal Rumble. The obligatory Road to WrestleMania begins this Sunday as we will witness men from WWE’s active roster and perhaps other names from WWE’s past vie for a chance at a WWE World Heavyweight Championship match at WrestleMania 31. Now it’s a matter of who will win, but perhaps more importantly, who will go into WrestleMania as the chance as Brock Lesnar’s title is in double jeopardy as he defends his title against the infallible John Cena and Mr. Money In The Bank, Seth Rollins. Let’s get a quick run-down of the card and see who will win each bout. I am not responsible for any money lost if you gamble based on my predictions.
Jimmy Uso (C) and Jey Uso (C) vs. The Miz and Damien Miz-dow : WWE Tag Team Championship
This match is a testament to how much WWE’s tag team division is lacking in the depth department. Since Survivor Series last year, these two have faced off at some capacity far too many times for me to count. When it’s all said and done, this match seems like a formality to The Miz and Mizdow going their separate ways as WWE has been booking growing tension between the two the past couple of weeks. As for the Usos, there is nothing more I can say about them that I have not already said. They are fine workers, but there’s nothing….intriguing about them. But you can expect them to retain the titles.
Winners: The Usos
The New Age Outlaws vs. The Ascension:
As far as I’m concerned, The Ascension’s biggest fanbase are the cricket demographic, as they always seem to be greeted by a confused group of fans. It’s like the fans know they are bad guys, but they don’t care about them enough to jeer them like their characters indicate they should be. This match doesn’t particularly have any buildup and sort of came more as a spot holder on the card as opposed to a concentrated feud in itself. History dictates that The Ascension go over here, because The Outlaws don’t have anything to gain here and are established legends in their own regard. Even if The Ascension comes away with the victory, it remains to be seen whether or not it will have any long term efficacy. Because their crowd reactions have been apathetic, and that’s putting it nicely. WWE needs to shake things up with them before they collapse in front of our eyes, because the tag team division could really use some salvaging.
Winners: The Ascension
Paige and Natyala vs. The Bella Twins
Instead of a triple threat bout between Paige, Natayla and Nikki for the title, they have a tag match? What is this? Is Teddy Long behind this? Well, seeing as how the winner of this match gains nothing, whoever wins won’t matter. I assume that since Natayla and Paige are shaping up to be contenders for the Divas title in the immediate future, I am picking them to go over here. But I could be wrong. But the thing is, I also don’t care about this match either. But who cares about the women these days anyway?
Winner: Paige and Natyala
Brock Lesnar (C) vs. John Cena vs. Seth Rollins – WWE World Heavyweight Championship
This has the potential to best his bout against Punk at Summerslam in 2013 to be his best match since returning on a part time basis in 2012. The intrigiue in this match lies not in the star power of the competitors, nor can it be attributed to the title being at stake. It’s because of its unpredictability. Brock Lesnar hasn’t been in a triple threat title bout since he defended his WWE Title against Kurt Angle and The Big Show at Vengeance back in 2003. Brock Lesnar has defended the title a grant total of one time since he won the title from Cena at last year’s Summerslam PPV, so logic would dictate in order to look strong, he would retain the title. Then you have Cena, who is looking to exact his revenge on Lesnar, who humiliated him in the most lopsided one on one world title bout in WWE history. And then there’s the young, conniving Seth Rollins. He is clearly the most intriguing factor into this match, because he doesn’t have to win to win the title, because he can force a WWE Championship match at any time of his choosing with his Money In The Bank briefcase, which is still valid until it expires at this year’s Money In The Bank PPV. There are so many subplots in this match and valid reasons as to why each man could retain the title, but the winner of this match will be an indication as to who WWE trusts will put the winner of the Royal Rumble over at WrestleMania the best and all three of these men have great cases. Lesnar is a formidable beast of nature, Cena has the pedigree not to mention that beating him clean at WrestleMania may hold the most ground while Rollins has his top heel status as well as the superior wrestling ability of the three men. Not knowing who will win may end up being the most fun way of predicting the winner of the match. I am going to be safe here and say that Lesnar will retain the belt. I cannot see WWE putting the belt back on Cena on such short notice and with two other men being in the ring, I cannot trust a MITB cash-in will be successful as the chance for interference is far too high. And you can forget about the idea of Rollins winning the belt while he holds on to the contract as it would eviscerate the entire point of the briefcase. Playing Devil’s Advocate here, I have tinkered scenarios where Heyman betrays Lesnar and sides with Rollins. For those of you unaware, Heyman has quite the history of betraying his clients, all of them in big match situations, including Lesnar. But don’t take my word for it, because I’m not the one in control here.
Winner: Brock Lesnar
30 Man Royal Rumble:
In recent years, the Royal Rumble has given us winners that a boy with a fifth grade’s education could have predicted. The favorites coming into this match have been everybody’s favorite bearded underdog Daniel Bryan and below average promo cutter Roman Reigns. News broke in recent weeks that had Triple H encourage the roster to step up and a winner would be chosen, due to some disagreement as to who should main event WrestleMania. Despite this report, stepping up won’t do any good in the realm of WWE’s reality. They’ll put the main event slot of WrestleMania on a man who ultimately is in the favor of Vince McMahon, because after all, WrestleMania is his baby. In no order, let’s take a look at some of the participants and their chances of winning the Rumble:
Roman Reigns: Reigns has been the topic of conversation when it comes to who is main eventing WrestleMania in the world title match. You can tell because of WWE’s insistence on shoving Roman down our throats. If it’s any indication, Roman’s undeserving Superstar of the Year triumph should give you enough reason to believe Roman will be an integral part of WWE’s long term plans. And don’t believe anything about that award being fan voted. Who wins over John Cena? His chances of winning the Rumble are probably as high as it can get, no matter how early I think it is for him to win.
Daniel Bryan: Daniel Bryan is another name that is mentioned in regards to winning the Rumble, and when it comes to who should win in the lines of logic, he makes the most sense. Bryan technically shouldn’t have to fight for a chance to reclaim the title that he never lost. But seeing as how this is not the case, he will have to fight his way through again, and you can expect some Authority shenanigans taking place while he is in the Rumble, whether it is he being the number 1 entrant, or him being eliminated by a guy not in the match. But you can expect him to last down the wire.
Dean Ambrose: A true dark horse here. The biggest thing ailing Ambrose is him always coming up short in big time matches, especially in his feud against Bray Wyatt. Heck, he lost the Miracle on 34th Street Fight. And faces never lose that match! Ambrose has the talent, but I don’t think he’s the type of man WWE wants main eventing WrestleMania this year and even if I’m wrong, WWE hasn’t shown us proof of this. But what I am hoping is that we get some sort of Ambrose/Reigns face off.
Bray Wyatt: Wyatt has yet to be in a feud over a world title and he has had a year of seasoning as a singles superstar. He’s come a long way since debuting as one-third of a cult known as The Wyatt Family. Not many people has mentioned Wyatt’s name when it comes to wrestlers who could win this Sunday, but he may very well should be. This can be supported by the fact that he just came off a pinfall victory against Daniel Bryan, even if it was with interference. Rumors suggest that Wyatt is being built up for a match with The Undertaker, though I can’t conceivably see how that match would be any good. I say don’t expect him to win, but he could give people a run for their money.
Dolph Ziggler: For those of you who don’t want spoilers, don’t read any further. You have been forewarned. Ziggler pinned the Intercontinental Champion Bad News Barrett to qualify for the Royal Rumble this Sunday. The only support Dolph may have for winning this year’s Rumble is that he is the man who was responsible for putting The Authority out of power in the first place. Not to mention this win has made him grow more in the favor of the fans and has emerged as one of WWE’s perennial babyfaces in the company. I’ve always said that if Ziggler wants to make the leap from mid-card purgatory into main-event glory, he needs to leave the IC Title behind. At least that part is accomplished. Fact of the matter is that if Ziggler wins, it shouldn’t come to a shock, but once again the issue lies in who he would feud with, and I don’t think we have received an indication that Ziggler will make the upset.
Rusev: I like the guy and WWE has booked him right. His gimmick isn’t exactly original, and his mic skill shave been overshadowed by his mouthpiece Lana. Rusev isn’t ready for a main event world title match at WrestleMania. But if he is booked right, he very well could be. It is more likely, though, that he will be pinned before that happens.
Kane: Is he really still here?
The Big Show: Right now, he shouldn’t be doing anything else other than putting young talent over and thus far he has beaten Erick Rowan twice, has let Seth Rollins take the pin when they are tag team partners and hasn’t taken a pinfall loss to Roman Reigns to this point. If nothing else, he is only here as a visual for his massive girth, and I suppose you an expect that Roman will be the one to eliminate him.
Goldust and Stardust: They are simply treading water at this point as they have not been relevant in the tag team division since dropping the titles at Survivor Series. I can only hope one turns on the other, so we can get the Rhodes/Goldust feud people have been been anticipating for some time now.
Los Matadores: If either of these two men win, I will run down Time Square in nothing other than my boxers.
Justin Gabriel: Seems more like a waste of a Rumble spot if you ask me. Maybe he will come out as The Bunny.
Fandango: Fandango’s “transformation” hasn’t exactly set anyone on fire, as the only thing different about him is his dance partner and his music. I admit, at first when I saw him, I liked the fresh look he had, but this gimmick isn’t going to correlate into a WrestleMania main event match.
Bad News Barrett: Am i wrong in saying that the IC title is a curse on Barrett? It seems every single time he wins the title he starts taking clean losses, and some unwarranted ones at that. I mean, Sin Cara? That loss alone disqualifies him from the race.
Of course we’d be remiss not to mention some of the potential surprise entrees we may get into the Rumble. These aren’t confirmed, but may be likely.
Randy Orton: Hasn’t seen action since November after being taken out by Seth Rollins. Him returning may not influence the more likely candidates, but his mere presence makes him a favorite. And if he doesn’t return in the Rumble, perhaps he interferes in the world title match. It is Rollins who took him out of action.
Rob Van Dam: May be a long shot, but Van Dam is always good for at least a pop when he returns. Winning the Rumble is certainly out of the question, but crazier things have happened. Maven eliminated The Undertaker from the Rumble once.
Sheamus: Sheamus was written off Survivor Series in what apparently was some injury that he had suffered and when he returned at least year’s Rumble he got a decent pop, and whenever he’s in the Rumble, he stays in pretty long. He has been rumored to turn heel, and a heel Sheamus would be a breath of fresh air. Don’t know if that will be enough for him to win.
Other surprises I have is either Sabu, Tommy Dreamer or Mick Foley, because this is Philadelphia, home of ECW. Other long shots for me include Chris Jericho, Rey Mysterio, Shelton Benjamin and Mark Henry among others.
In the end, my prediction to win the entire bonanza is Roman Reigns. It isn’t my personal favorite to win the match, but this is because WWE is pushing Reigns as the next big superstar, and you can see it by the way he’s being booked. I’m surprised that they haven’t made a big deal of him not being pinned in singles competition as well, at least I don’t think he hasn’t. Reigns holds the record for most Rumble eliminations and has Superstar of the Year under neath his belt. You don’t get these things overnight. I’m pulling for Bryan to win and Ambrose and Ziggler as potential upsets, but this is only because WWE seems to have faith in him, and as WWE has shown in the past, they will push who they want, whenever they want.
Winner: Roman Reigns
I’ll post a review of the show after it’s over. Until we meet again.
